How To Disappear Completely
by Darling Pretty
Summary: A lingering conversation outside of Joe's has some pretty serious consequences for Addison and Alex. "We think it would be best if... If you went into Witness Protection." Addex!
1. Oh What A Day

**Oh, don't mind me, just starting another story that I shouldn't be. But I just got _so _freaking excited about this one. And I hope you are too! The first chapter's _kind of _heavy, but not really, and then I don't think it should deviate from light, frothy fluff. :)**

**I don't own anything.**

Addison and Alex linger in front of Joe's, talking. They've recently constructed a fragile truce that means they don't try too hard to make the other's existence hell. Normally they wouldn't be talking to each other outside of the hospital, but Izzie's inside the bar, flirting with Mark. And that sight was enough to for them to agree to hightail it out of there. But now they're talking for really no apparent reason other than the fact that neither of them wants to go home.

Addison smiles at him as a black car drives by them. She's about to comment on his surprising self-control regarding Izzie when the shots are fired and the squealing of a car's tires trying to get traction as the driver speeds away can be heard.

Instinct tells Alex to grab Addison and get down. Fast. So that's what he does, probably not doing any favors for her shoulder in the process, but, hey, shots are being fired and her shoulder is kind of the least of his concerns.

Instinct tells Addison to look up and memorize what she can of the license plate. She whips out her phone and texts it to herself before she can forget. Then she realizes that Alex is still practically on top of her (not comfortable) and that he's positioned himself between her and the car (sweet, but still not comfortable). She half shoves him off of her and looks around. About twenty feet away, three men lay bleeding out on the concrete. Without thinking about it too much, she hurries over and starts mentally cataloguing what she can do to help.

"Addison!" Alex exclaims. "What are you doing?"

"Three men are dying, Alex. I'm clearly not playing tiddlywinks. Get your ass over here and help me!"

So he does. But not without one question, which he asks while already dialing 911. "Tiddlywinks?"

"Shut up."

0ooo0

Even though they do everything they can until the men can be transported to Seattle Grace, two of the victims die and the third lies in the ICU, breathing, but not expected to wake up. Addison is silently berating herself for not doing more when a hand is laid on her shoulder. She looks up to see Alex. "The cops want to talk to you," he says quietly. "Get your statement and stuff. I just got done."

"Oh. Um, right."

She gets up to leave. "Hey, are you okay?" he asks before she can go.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just fine. Fine."

He raises an eyebrow, something she likes to think he picked up from her. "You don't look fine," he accuses her. "You look like your clothes are covered in the blood of three men you tried to save and you look tired and hungry and about ready to kill someone. But I'm not seeing fine anywhere."

She takes a deep breath and draws herself up to full height. "I'm fine," she repeats, jutting her chin out. Maybe if she says it enough, she'll believe it.

"How's your shoulder?" he asks. "I probably banged it up pretty badly."

"A little stiff," she admits. "Thanks, for, um, that, or whatever."

"No problem," he says, just ask awkward when she brings up the fact that at the end of the day, he kind of just chose her life over his own. "Just glad you're okay."

She smiles. "Yeah, uh, same to you." They smile at each other for a moment before Addison breaks the silence. "Well, I should probably…" she trails off, gesturing vaguely somewhere in the direction of the conference room.

"Right," he says, sounding as if he had been holding his breath.

"Yeah, I… I should go," she replies and hurries off.

0ooo0

"State your name for the record, please," the detective, Detective O'Conner, asks her.

"Addison Forbes Montgomery-Sh- Montgomery. Addison Forbes Montgomery," she states, almost shoving the Shepherd onto the end of Montgomery out of force of habit. She hasn't really gotten used to leaving off half of her last name yet.

"Thanks," Detective O'Conner says. "Now, what can you tell me about what you saw?"

He asks her a bunch of questions designed to help form the clearest depiction of the events of earlier that night and she replies as accurately and thoroughly as her memory will allow. "Can you describe the car?" he finally asks her.

She smiles a little. "I can one up you, Detective. I can give you a license plate. Or most of it, anyways."

He looks surprised. "Well then, by all means, Miss Montgomery, let's have it."

He leaves the room, presumably to alert everyone to the danger lying in this car. When he returns, he announces, "I just have two more questions and then you're free to go."

She smiles. Giving her account of the night has actually helped her. At least she feels like she's doing _something _to help those poor men. "Fire away."

"One, would you be willing to testify? Assuming we catch the bastards, that is."

"Yes. Absolutely."

"Okay, good. And two, would it be too forward of me to ask if I can call you some time after this is all over?"

Addison smiles again. "That's very sweet," she says. "But yes, it would be too forward."

"Thought so," he sighs. "Ah well. You have my card if you think of anything else. Or if you want to rethink my offer." He ends his statement with an ironically cheesy wink and grin.

She laughs. "I'll be sure to call if I think of anything."

0ooo0

"How'd it go?" Alex asks when she gets out.

"Fine. Why are you still here? Why didn't you go home already?"

He shrugs. "I wanted to make sure that you're okay."

She rolls her eyes. "I'm fine. Tired, but fine."

"Okay."

"Okay."

There's another awkward silence as they stare at each other. "I'm going to go find an on call room," Addison announces. "By the time I get back to the Archfield, I'll only get like two hours of sleep anyways. At least this way, I can sleep a little bit more before having to come back here."

"Sounds like a good idea."

It almost sounds like he wants her to invite him so (and she blames this on mental duress) she does. "Do you, uh, want to come with? How far _is _Meredith's place anyways?"

"Far enough when you don't have a car. So an on call room sounds good."

"Wait, you don't have a car? How do you get to work in the morning?"

"I run. Or if it's raining too badly, I catch a ride with Izzie or Meredith."

"You _run_. You _run _to work?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I guess that solves the mystery of why you're disgustingly in shape," she comments as she miraculously manages to spot an open door to an empty on call room.

"I'm going to grab some scrubs to sleep in. You want some?" he offers, ignoring the comment about his physical fitness.

"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks. And I'll set an alarm on my cell phone so we wake up on time."

He returns five minutes later and she's already asleep on the bed. He shakes her gently and she stirs with a groan. "Here," he whispers, shoving the scrubs into her hands. "Put them on."

"I'm tired," she complains, not moving.

"Addison, you've got somebody else's blood on you. Put the damn scrubs on."

She does as she's told without any sort of attempt to hide her body (well, she's been up for almost twenty-four hours now and she's beyond caring). Alex averts his eyes, trying to remain somewhere in her good graces.

Even with the idea of an undressing Addison in his head, he manages to fall asleep quickly and doesn't wake up until her phone rings, signaling the alarm.

Even with the idea of a very physically fit Alex jogging to work in her head, Addison manages to fall asleep quickly and doesn't wake up until her phones blares the alarm.

0ooo0

"Dr. Montgomery?" one of the nurses asks two days later.

"Yes, Nikita?" Addison makes a point of knowing everyone on her staff.

"There's two people here to see you? They say it's important?" She's one of those people that don't have the ability to speak in anything but questions.

"I have my hands _inside_ a woman's uterus at the moment, Nikita," Addison says patiently. She catches Alex's eye and swears he's grinning behind his mask. "Tell them that it's not _that_ important."

"Um, it's a cop and a lawyer?"

"Sounds like a bad joke waiting to happen," Addison murmurs under her breath and swears that she hears Alex chuckle quietly.

"And they want you and Dr. Karev? What should I tell them?"

"Tell them that I'm elbow deep in uterus at the moment," Addison mumbles, never happy for distractions during surgery. "_That _ought to shut them up."

Alex develops a sudden coughing fit that sounds suspiciously like laughter.

"Tell them we'll be there as soon as possible," Addison formally replies to the nurse. That is, loud enough for her to hear. "Have them wait in the conference room."

"Alright; you're sure?"

"Positive, Nikita."

0ooo0

When they finally do get out of surgery, they find Detective O'Conner and a woman they've never seen before enter the room.

"Detective O'Conner," Addison smiles, "I thought we agreed this was too forward."

He grins back. "While I can be _very _persistent when I want to be, I'm actually here about the drive-by shooting."

"Dude, are you _flirting_? With _him_? Seriously?" Alex whispers in her ear.

"None of your business." She hides her response behind another smile.

"Not worth it," he informs her.

"I'm Lindsay Paddington," the woman says, holding out her hand for both of the doctors to shake. "Assistant District Attorney."

"Nice to meet you," Addison responds politely.

"Good news, Miss Montgomery," Detective O'Conner says.

"_Miss_? You let him call you _miss_?" Alex hisses.

"The license plate number you gave us let us find the car you saw two nights ago. Unfortunately, it was abandoned in a ditch, but a subsequent search of the surround woods allowed us to apprehend the criminals."

"Dude talks like a textbook." Alex comments in her ear. Unfortunately, Addison has to agree with Alex on this one. That was a very stiff speech.

"Good," Addison smiles. "I'm glad I could help."

"Are you still willing to testify?" Lindsay asks them both. They both answer in the affirmative. "Good. Then there's one thing I need to discuss with you. The men we caught, they weren't alone. They part of a much larger crime syndicate. And the trouble is that they have some friends in some very high places. Places that are in a position to make life very difficult, even dangerous, for those who cross them."

"Just what are you trying to say?" Alex asks.

"We think that, due to the high risk of retaliation from the men's friends, it might be best if…"

"If you went into Witness Protection," Detective O'Conner finishes.

* * *

**I'd love to hear thoughts!**

**-Juli-**


	2. Motion Sickness

**Yep, how about that? Another chapter! Sorry, I just really, really like this story and it appears you do too… THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! I really can't say that enough. They really do make my day and it's nice to know that there are people out there actually enjoying what I write. So thanks. Really, I mean that.**

**This program is brought to you by viewers like you…**

**And I own nothing.**

* * *

"Um, excuse me?" Addison laughs nervously.

"Look, Miss Montgomery," Lindsay starts.

"Doctor," Alex corrects her. "She's a doctor."

Shocked, Addison sneaks a glance at him. He doesn't look back at her, just stares the attorney down.

"_Doctor_ Montgomery," Lindsay repeats with the necessary corrections. "These men have friends whose job it is to make sure you _don't _testify. And we just feel that you will be much safer if you go into Witness Protection."

"Miss Montgomery," Detective O'Conner says. One look from Alex makes him amend his statement. "Doctor Montgomery. I know this is a difficult decision to make, but unfortunately you need to make it quickly."

She shakes her head. "What about Alex? Why aren't you trying to convince him?"

"Because I don't look like someone just shot me," Alex informs her.

She turns to face him. "And why don't you? They're asking us to completely uproot our lives!"

"Because I'd rather not be dead. Besides, I'm an intern; it's not like I've made a name for myself. Not like you."

"Doctor Montgomery, we need a decision fairly quickly. You're not a difficult person to find and we need to move fast if we're going to keep you safe," Lindsay says. "Will you agree to join?"

Addison glances at everyone in the room; the calm, pit bull competency radiating off of Lindsay, the sort of goofy half-smile that hides Detective O'Conner's force, and the steady gaze of Alex Karev, almost begging her to agree. Since when does he beg her to do anything?

"Okay," she agrees. "I'm in."

"Great," Lindsay says.

"I'll go get everything ready," Detective O'Conner offers. Lindsay smiles and leaves with him. When the door closes with a quiet click, Addison collapses onto one of the chairs.

"You okay?" Alex asks.

She buries her face in her hands. "This is just… it's so fast. I mean, one minute, I'm in surgery, the next I'm being forced to leave behind everything."

"No one's forcing you," Alex points out. His tone is a little begrudging, almost as if he doesn't want to give her any ideas about walking away from this.

"No, but everyone's right. It's safer."

The door swings open before he can reply. "Okay, we're ready to go," Detective O'Conner says.

"Go?" Alex asks.

"You'll be sequestered under police protection until we can hand you off to the US Marshals where you'll be relocated," he explains.

"You have about two hours to go home and pack up all of your things," Lindsay continues.

Alex turns to look at Addison, certain that he's about to hear some protest or complaint, but it appears that the freak out switch has been flipped off and they are now in the presence of Efficient, Unemotional Addison. She nods her consent and he follows suit.

0ooo0

Ten hours later, they're sitting in a federal building in Sacramento, California. They've been put up in a hotel that is clearly not up to Addison's standards, but she's still in Efficient, Unemotional mode, so she doesn't comment. Truth be told, Alex is getting a little worried about her, mostly because he's not used to going this long without hearing her yell at _somebody_.

"Hi," a brunette woman says with a smile as she comes in the room. "I'm Emerson Wiley, your marshal. You can just call me Emerson. Or Em. Whatever. This is my partner, Graham Leland." She nods to the blond guy who entered with her.

Addison and Alex both smile and introduce themselves. Graham speaks up when he sees their faces. "Look, I know this is all really overwhelming, but you're doing something good. Just focus on that."

"Okay, so we're going to take through all of the rules of the program right now, okay?" Emerson asks. "First of all, and most importantly, you can't have any contact with your former lives. I know it sucks, but there are reasons these rules are there. It's for your safety and for everyone around you."

"Of course," Graham speaks up, "As with anything, there are certain exceptions. But those are only for emergencies and only happen if arranged in advance."

"Obviously no one can know that you're in the program," Emerson continues. "I think that goes without saying."

"You'll be provided with a place to live, a stipend to live on, and employment," Graham explains.

"Here's the bad part," Emerson grimaces. "We can't place you in a job that might connect you with your past. That makes it way too easy for the bad guys to find you. You're both doctors, aren't you?"

"Surgeons," they both correct her in unison.

"Surgeons. Unfortunately, we can't allow you to get jobs in the medical field. We'll be happy to help you find any other job you may want, but, for your safety, we can't let you be doctors. Okay?"

There's silence as Addison and Alex try to process this fact. It's broken by Addison pushing her chair back with so much force that it falls over. "No," she says simply before storming out of the room.

Both marshals get up to follow her, but Alex stops them. "I'll go after her," he offers.

"Well, I should really-" Emerson starts.

Alex interrupts her with a steely gaze. "Have you known her for more than an hour? No? I'm going after her. I'll bring her back. Okay?" The last word is clearly a mockery of Emerson's rather annoying habit of tacking the question on to almost every possibly controversial statement.

He's out the door before they can stop him.

He finds her in a hallway nearby, pacing. He watches her for a moment then steps into her way and grabs her gently by the arms, careful to hold her at arm's length. "Hey, I know this is hard but-"

She cuts off his well-intentioned speech by yanking out of his hold. "Hard? _Hard_? I got through Yale and Columbia without a single B. I've become a freaking neonatal superstar. I've gone shopping on Black Friday in _New York_. _That's _hard! This… This is just… This is a nightmare." She begins pacing again. "I'm a _surgeon,_ Alex. A surgeon. And now they're telling me I can't do that anymore all because I was in the wrong place at the wrong moment! How is that fair? I don't _know _how to do anything else! I'm a surgeon. It's what I _do_ and now I can't do it. I don't know how to _be _anything else! It's not fair!"

"Addison-" he tries to start again, but now she turns on him.

"And _you_, you're just standing there all calm. How can you be calm? Don't you care at all?"

He takes advantage of the fact that she needs to take a breath to put his two cents in. "Of course I care. I don't like it any more than you do. But we can't change what happened, Addison."

"Why aren't you freaking out?" she asks, her voice suddenly laden with all the tears she hasn't had a chance to cry.

He grins at her. "Because you seem to be doing enough for the both of us."

She sighs and runs a hand through her hair. "I'm sorry, I just…"

"I get it."

She wipes a hand across her eyes, betraying just how tired she is. "I'm glad I don't have to do this alone," she says quietly.

He doesn't respond to that. That's heading into possibly dangerous territory and they're already floating through unchartered waters. "We should probably get back," he observes.

"Right," Addison says, standing up straight, trying to put just a little more fight back into her posture. She smiles weakly. "Hey, maybe we'll even find out what the rest of the world is going to be calling us."

He laughs a little and puts his hand on the small of her back to lead her back to the room. They both pretend not to notice that she leans into his touch and he brings her in a little closer to his body.

* * *

**Okay, so this chapter was a little less light and frothy than promised, but I feel like a freak out would be necessary in a situation like this. Light and frothy will come later, I promise. There will be light and froth!**

**-Juli-**

**P.S. Gigi, I know she's not staying the same kickass surgeon… Sorry. But just trust me, okay?**


	3. Strangers

**I **_**really **_**like this chapter. Of course, I wrote it at about one in the morning, so the sleep deprivation may have something to do with this. But I promised a return to light and froth did I not? I think it delivers, but hey, maybe that's just me. Anyways, enjoy.**

**I don't own anything.**

* * *

"Sorry," Addison apologizes as Alex escorts her back into the room.

"No problem," Graham says. "It's a lot to take in."

"It just was a surprise, that's all. I needed to get used to it."

"Well, now we're going to spring some more on you, okay?" Emerson asks.

"Fine, whatever," Addison sighs, flipping her hair back over her shoulder. She glances at Alex. "I can take whatever you dish out."

"Okay."

"We realize that a whole new name would be too difficult to acclimate to," Graham says.

"Acclimate?" Alex whispers in Addison's ear. "What is it with you and guys who talk like dictionaries?"

"Shut up," Addison whispers back.

"You'll be given new last names, new driver's licenses, new everything. We'll do everything possible to make sure that you're untraceable," Emerson says.

Addison leans back over to comment quietly in Alex's ear. "The way they keep switching off kind of scares me."

"You think?" he replies, choking back a laugh.

"Can I ask a question?" Emerson asks. "It pertains to your living arrangement."

Addison and Alex glance at each other suspiciously.

"Well, I was just wondering if you two were… um, the thing is that…"

"She wants to know if you're shacking up," Graham finishes for his partner.

Addison and Alex both choke on absolutely nothing while they stammer out a resounding absolutely not.

Emerson blushes. "It's just we need to know how to situate you, and if you were living together back home, then it would be different and given the way you two act…"

The pair look at each other in alarm. As far as they're concerned, they don't act like anything, much less like they sleep together.

"Sorry," Emerson mumbles and elbows Graham when he doesn't do the same.

"Yeah, sorry."

They look at each other again and start laughing, mostly because that's the only way to deal with this without actually dealing with the accusations. "Not happening," Alex chuckles.

"_So _not happening," Addison affirms with a giggle.

"And, dude, nobody says shacking up."

0ooo0

Within two days, they're settled into their new apartment. They decided to room together in a two bedroom place; it's just easier knowing that they can talk to each other whenever. While it's certainly not something that Addison would pick for herself, it's not bad. It's downtown, right near the historic part of town and with a view of the Sacramento River.

Addison looks up from her post on the couch when he walks in the door. "Hey. Any luck?" she asks, referring to his search for a job. She's volunteering at the library until she can find something to occupy herself.

"Not yet," he replies.

"Do you even know what you want to do?" she enquires.

"Not really," he sighs, sitting down next to her.

She picks at the sofa. "We really need to redecorate this place," she comments. It's amazing how quickly they've become a we. "It's kind of hideous."

"We really need money if we're going to redecorate this place," he retorts.

"That would require jobs," she sighs. "Which would mean figuring out what the hell we want to do."

Another sigh emanates from her. Of all the restrictions placed on them, the job one is the hardest. She's spent the majority of her life working towards becoming a surgeon and now all of that has been dumped down the garbage chute. It's not a pleasant feeling. And it's not like her job has really left her any sort of time to develop any other sort of interests. She's at a loss for what to do. "I'm tired," she admits.

He gets up with a smile. "Lucky for you, it's my turn to cook."

She laughs. Cooking so far has been who wants to run down to one of the fast food places and grab a meal.

"Addison, I'm serious."

"You _cook_ too? Is there anything you _don't_ do?" she asks sarcastically.

He pretends to think about it. "I've never gone skydiving before," he finally points out.

She rolls her eyes. "But you could if you wanted to. You're a truly disgusting human being, Alex Ka- McCarthy." She pauses and then asks, "How the hell am I supposed to yell at you when I can't call you Karev?" She pretends she doesn't feel the pinprick of tears behind her eyes.

"Here's a novel idea—don't yell at me."

She rolls her eyes and scoffs, happy that he's already learning to navigate her constantly shifting moods with ease. "Yeah, like _that's _ever going to work."

"Worth a shot," he shrugs. "Okay, I'm going to get started on dinner."

And then Addison thinks things through and sits up straight. "We don't have any food. How are you making dinner?"

He laughs. "I actually went to this place called the grocery store. Maybe you've heard of it?"

"You went to the store? When?"

"While you were at the library."

Addison's eyes widen in surprise. "You mean there's been food in this apartment all day?"

"You didn't think about checking the kitchen?"

"I didn't think there'd actually be food there!" Addison exclaims defensively.

He starts cracking up. She gets up and starts physically moving him towards the kitchen. "Go. Cook. I'm hungry."

"You wouldn't be if you had bothered to check the kitchen!"

"Shut up."

0ooo0

"Oh my God, this is _so _good," Addison moans in delight as she shoves another unladylike forkful of homemade lasagna into her mouth.

"You say that whenever you're hungry," Alex points out with a laugh.

Her blue eyes slide up to meet his brown ones as she finishes chewing the bite. She dabs daintily at her lips with a napkin. "Okay, yeah, but Alex, this is… this is different." She motions towards the lasagna with her fork. "This is like an orgasm on a plate!"

He nearly chokes on his own lasagna when she says that. And she just keeps going unaware of the enjoyment he gets from the novelty of hearing her say such a taboo word over and over again. "I mean, I think my mouth just had an orgasm. It was a mouth-gasm. I just had a mouth-gasm. And why are you staring at me like I'm wandering around in my underwear?"

"What are you _on_?" Alex laughs.

"What? Am I not allowed to say orgasm? Orgasm, orgasm, orgasm. I can't help it if your lasagna is orgasmic." Normally she wouldn't be so… silly, for lack of a better word, but clearly normally has flown straight out the window and crash landed about two hundred feet below and has no chance of recovery. That realization is starting to wear on her and she's starting to realize that Alex Karev is the only person in the world who knows exactly what she's going through. May as well make herself comfortable around him.

"I feel like I should take you into the hospital and get you checked out. I think you've gone insane."

She calms down and takes another bite of the orgasmic lasagna. After savoring it properly she meets his eyes again. "Who taught you to cook like this?"

His eyes kind of glaze over, as if he's not entirely there with her anymore. Instead, he's watching something that she's not privy to on a screen that nobody can see. "My grandma did," he informs her. "Before she died. My dad would beat up my mom and most days she either wouldn't get out of bed or was high. My grandma would cook for me and my siblings and sneak the food over when my dad wasn't home. When I was ten, she was diagnosed with cancer and she knew she wouldn't beat it, so she taught me so we'd always have food at least. She died a year later, but not before beating her recipes into my head."

Addison doesn't know how to respond to that. It's not something that comes with a manual and a list of possible responses. So instead of talking, she slips her hand across the table and touches his hand lightly. They stay like that, Addison's hand resting gently on top of his, for a silence that seems to stretch into eternity. But eventually it feels like it needs to be broken or they're going to stay frozen in time forever and that's going to get embarrassing. So Addison breaks it, catching his eye. "Do you think your grandma would be offended that I called her lasagna orgasmic?"

Alex throws his head back and laughs.

0ooo0

Alex is trying to get comfortable in bed later that night when the door to his room creeps open, flooding the room with light from the hallway. Looking up, he sees Addison's silhouette approach the bed. "Alex, you awake?" she whispers.

"Yeah," he mumbles from the land of the half-conscious.

"Scoot over," she orders. He does as he's commanded before he can question it. She slips under the covers with him.

"You okay?" he asks, suddenly very much awake.

"You know, I never, _ever _thought I would say this, but I miss the rain."

She's homesick. She's homesick and she's in his bed. Old Alex would take advantage of this situation before you could say the word sex. New Alex merely thinks about what Old Alex would do and resolves to not do it, no matter how much he might want to. "Yeah, I was right earlier. You've gone insane."

He can feel her body shift as she lets out a short burst of laughter and it shifts closer to him. "Which is probably why I'm glad I'm here with you and not, say, Mark," she retorts.

"I'm not like him, you know," Alex comments, not sure why he feels the need to make sure that Addison realizes that he's nothing like his ex-idol.

She turns to face him. "I know," she says quietly with a smile. And then, because they can both feel this headed into some terrifyingly personal areas, they shift away from each other. Addison grins. "I mean, I've been in bed with you a good five minutes and you haven't even _tried_ to feel me up yet."

It's his turn to laugh now. "Would you like me to?" he offers as a joke.

"Hmm, let me think about that… No," she replies and buries the secret yes somewhere back in the recesses in her mind that she never looks at anyways.

He grins. "Get some sleep, Addison."

"You're a really good cook, Alex," she announces all of a sudden.

"Um, thanks?"

"No, I mean that," she says, pushing herself up into a sitting position.

"Okay. Thanks."

"Do you like to cook?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Well, maybe that's something you can do."

"Addison-"

"Just a thought. Anyways, I'm going to sleep," she declares, lying back down, rolling so her back is to him.

"You're not going back to your room?" he asks skeptically.

"Nope." He can tell from her voice that her eyes are already closed and she's already starting to drift out of consciousness.

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because isn't a reason, Addison," he mentions.

"Because shut up, Alex. That's why."

He rolls his eyes. "Get some sleep, Addison."

She turns her head to look at him. "And no funny business."

He shakes his head. "Wouldn't dream of it." This would be the truth except it's a complete lie; even New Alex so totally _would _dream of it. Hey, the woman is hot and uses the word orgasm repeatedly. And that's not his fault at all.

* * *

**I think I only like this chapter because I got to quote myself… But if you've ever had a ZPies molten lava cake, then you will understand the meaning of an orgasm on a plate. It is the best tasting thing I have **_**ever **_**put in my mouth. That cake most definitely gave me a mouth-gasm. See what happens when you hang around my friends for too long? You start saying things like mouth-gasm.**

**Anyways, I don't really have any plans for careers for either Addison or Alex, so I'd love ideas, thoughts, or comments!**

**-Juli-**


	4. Sympathetic Vibrations

**Hey! Sorry this took a little longer than the other chapters, but my muse decided to take a small vacation. She's back now. Promise.**

**This chapter is dedicated to Gigi, just for the opening sentence. And I said I would.**

**And I own nothing.**

Nag, nag, nag, nag. When Addison's in a bad mood (and that happens a lot more often now), she's certain that's Emerson's job description. Because she's always popping up, wondering if they need anything or if she can help with anything. She's like the Sydney Heron of the US Marshals. Which wouldn't be terrible because Addison did always have a soft spot for the perky resident even when nobody else did, except for the fact that Emerson has somehow managed to combine the almost drug-induced peppiness of Sydney with Addison's mother's talent for nagging. Hang around in her presence for five minutes and you will be reminded of at least one of the rules of the program and that reminder will come with a perky, apologetic speech about _why _the rule is in place. She means well, but God it's annoying.

And Graham, they've discovered, is a man of very few words—probably because Emerson takes all of them. When he does open his mouth, he'll say something so horrendously out of date that only Addison's polite upbringing keeps her from giggling.

Addison rolls her eyes when her new cell phone rings as she walks into the apartment. There are three people with this number and that means that it's Emerson, Graham, or Alex calling and Alex is probably in the other room. Glancing down at the caller id, she sees that it's Emerson. She sighs and rolls her neck as she brings the phone up to her ear. "Hello?"

"Addison? It's me, Emerson."

"Got that, thanks." This whole ordeal has made her a much crankier person. She doesn't like having to _think_ about how much money she's spending. She doesn't like being told over and over again that there are men out there who want her dead. And she _hates _that she hasn't been in an OR for over three weeks now.

"Sorry." She doesn't sound sorry. As far as Addison can tell, the perky marshal is starting to get annoyed with her and that's just fine with her.

"So what's up?" Addison asks, exhaling noisily, forcing the crankiness out of her system. She doesn't _like _being rude; it goes against everything she's ever been taught and everything she prides herself on.

"I was doing some thinking. About you know your job and stuff?"

"Okay…"

"What if you went back to school?"

Addison laughs. "Excuse me?"

"No, I'm serious. Okay, look, one of my really close friends runs one of the private schools around here, Loretto. It's an all girls, Catholic high school, and they need an anatomy teacher pretty badly because theirs is retiring. State law doesn't require teaching credentials for temps at a private school. You could temp and help out around the classroom, maybe guest speak, while getting your credentials and you could fill her spot when she does retire."

Addison mulls it over and Emerson continues. "I realize that it's not ideal. You're not going to get into an OR again. But at least all of the work you put into your degrees won't go entirely to waste. And it's something in science. I could pull some strings if it's okay with you."

Addison's quiet for a moment, thinking. "I'd appreciate that, Emerson. Thank you."

Addison expects her to hang up but instead she asks, "You don't like me very much do you?"

"What, no, I-" Addison stammers, blindsided.

"It's okay. I don't care. But you don't and I just don't know why."

Addison sighs. "Alex and I know the rules by now."

"What?"

"Every time I talk to you you've lectured me about some rule or another. I might be better versed in the rules than you are now."

"Oh."

"Sorry."

"No, I know it's annoying. Sorry."

"Emerson."

"I have to go, Addison. I'll check up on you later. And I'll make that call."

"Um, thanks."

"Bye."

They hang up and Addison lies down on the couch, kicking off her heels. Alex comes into the room. "Who were you talking to?"

"Emerson."

"What'd she want?" he asks, picking up her feet to sit down with her. She places her feet tentatively in his lap—they haven't really established what physical contact is okay when he's not comforting her. To her surprise, he starts massaging them.

"Mmm…" she hums, closing her eyes. He traces the red mark left by her heels.

"I will never get why you wear those."

"Because I like them," she retorts.

"So you like to look good more than you hate being in pain?"

"They're not that bad. And besides, you shouldn't complain. You like them. _You_ think they make my legs look sexy," she teases him.

"Sure, yeah. But this right here," he says, tracing the red indentation from the straps. "Not so sexy."

She whacks him in the shoulder. He slaps the bottom of her foot. "Ow!" she exclaims. "I can't believe you'd hit a girl!"

He looks at her calmly. "You're no girl."

Addison lets out a very indignant cry and removes her feet from his lap. She struggles to find an acceptable retort, but the only thing she can come up with is "Nuh-uh, I_ am_ a girl", which would just be plain embarrassing, and then it's long past the acceptable time to retort and to say anything back would be incredibly lame. So she glares at him, clambers off the couch, and goes to the kitchen and grabs a beer. "You want one?" she calls. He consents and she brings one for him too.

"It's weird that you drink beer," he comments.

She frowns at him. "I drink beer."

"I didn't say you don't. I said it's weird."

"Why is it weird?"

He can tell from the tone in her voice that this is going to require some quick thinking and more than his usually nonexistent dose of diplomacy. "It's just… you're you. You're Addison Forbes Montgomery."

"Todd," Addison interrupts.

"What?"

"It's Addison Todd now. Not Forbes Montgomery. I'm Addison Todd."

"Whatever. Just because your name changed doesn't mean you did. And Addison Whoever doesn't seem like the type of person to drink beer."

"Well, maybe you don't know me as well as you think you do," Addison says with a sly grin.

"Oh, I know you," he laughs.

She leans forward so that when she speaks her lips brush against his ear. "There's plenty about me you don't know, Alex Karev," she whispers. "And there are some things that you're_ never_ going to find out."

She smirks as she pushes off of the couch and goes into her bedroom. Alex stays very much frozen and watches her walk away.

0ooo0

She smoothes her skirt as she walks onto the campus, pretending that it's purely to smooth the garment and _not _to dry her slightly sweaty palms. She's going in to Loretto today to see if Emerson's plan is even vaguely feasible and for the first time in a very, very long time, Addison is nervous. And she doesn't like it. She doesn't like the fluttering in her stomach or the feeling that her thighs are made out of nothing more solid than Jell-O. It's not a feeling that she's used to and it's not one that she _wants _to get used to either.

After locating the front office and telling the woman at the front desk that she's there to see the principal, Leslie Marin, she's directed to sit on one of the chairs. She looks around as she waits, mostly just to keep herself from fidgeting too much. For a Catholic school, the religious touches are subtle. Other than a cross beneath the clock, the front office is comfortable, warm, and plastered with pictures of the students doing various activities.

"Ms. Todd?" Addison looks up to find herself staring into a pair of startling green eyes. "I'm Leslie Marin."

The most shocking thing about the principal is not the eyes, Addison decides. No, the most shocking detail is definitely the fact that he's a man. And an attractive man at that.

"It's, um, nice to meet you," she stammers, holding out her hand as she stands up, praying that her hand isn't _too _sweaty.

"Why don't you come into my office and we can talk?" he asks.

She nods mutely and can't help feeling like somewhere Emerson is having a really good laugh. She makes a mental note to hurt the marshal the next time she sees her.

"Can I get you anything? A glass of water, perhaps?"

"Hmm?" she hums, her eyes opening wide as she realizes that she didn't hear a word he had said.

His mouth twists into an amused smirk. "You're a friend of Emerson's, right?" he asks.

"Um, yes."

"And she didn't tell you that I'm a man, did she?"

"Um, no."

"So you're a little shocked right now." He grins at her.

She smiles back. "A little," she admits.

"Feeling a little blindsided, I'd imagine."

"Just a little," she responds.

"Don't feel bad," he comforts her. "One of Emerson's favorite things to do is forget to mention to everyone that I'm a guy."

"What?" Addison laughs.

"We've been friends since… forever. And her main source of taunting has always come from the fact that my name is Leslie."

"As if Emerson's any better?" Addison replies wryly.

"You know, Ms. Todd, I may like you," he laughs. She smiles back.

"Good, I'm glad. After all, that's what I'm trying to convince you of here."

"Right. You want to join the science department, right?"

"Right. But just not chemistry or physics. I'm not very good at chemistry and physics and I battle to the death."

He laughs. "You want to help out Mrs. Hunt in anatomy. That's what Emerson told me. I'm right in thinking that?"

"That you are. Um, I don't have teaching credentials, but I went to medical school." She and Emerson had decided that this would be an acceptable admission.

"You seem more than qualified," he agrees, looking at her largely fabricated—but government sanctioned—résumé. "And if you were to get your credentials, I'd be more than happy to keep you on for as long as the job exists."

Addison smiles. "Thank you so much."

"Not a problem." Suddenly, the principal gets a little nervous. "Perhaps we could meet for dinner some time to discuss details?" he asks.

She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. Scanning the room quickly, she finds no sign that he's married. Normally she'd say yes right off the bat, but that nervous hint in his voice cues her in to something more. "Now, are you asking me as my potential boss or as a potential something else?" She knows the answer. She wouldn't have asked the question if she didn't know the answer.

She pretends not to notice the blush creeping up his neck. "Maybe a little of both," he confesses.

She quirks an eyebrow. "Do you really think that's professional? As my boss?"

He grins. "I haven't hired you yet, Ms. Todd."

"It's Addison," she replies. "And what happens if you _do _decide to hire me? What then?"

"Well, then…" He thinks for a moment. "Then I'm the principal and I make the rules anyways."

She laughs. "I'll think about it."

"So that's not a no?"

"That's not a no."

**This makes me a little nervous… Am I able to come out of my room without heavy or sharp objects being flung at my head?**

**-Juli-**


	5. I Walk The Line

**I know this isn't very long, but I promised Gigi that I would put the next chapter up soon and I reached a good stopping point for the chapter. So enjoy, please!**

**And I just want to take second to say, once again, thank you **_**so **_**much for all the reviews. They really do mean the world to me. It's exciting to know that other people like this just as much as I do. Y'all are doing wonders for my self-esteem!**

**I don't own anything.**

* * *

Addison stands in the bathroom, running a brush through her hair. "So I got asked out on a date today," she yells to Alex. Something clatters to the ground in Alex's general direction. "You okay?" she calls.

"Fine. Who asked you out?"

"Leslie Marin. And I'm thinking about saying yes."

Something else clatters to the ground. "_What_?"

She pokes her head out of the door. "Leslie's a man, Alex," she clarifies.

"Oh. Wait, what?"

"Yeah, apparently Emerson takes great pleasure from not telling people that."

Alex laughs a little. "She _would _think that was funny."

"Not so funny when you're staring at your new boss like he's suddenly sprouted a second head."

"You got the job?" She nods. "Good!" He steps in and hugs her.

She smiles. "Thanks."

"So this guy asked you out?" he asks. They sit down on the couch. Addison folds her legs up underneath herself and turns her body to face him.

"Yeah."

"And you said?"

"That I'd think about it."

"Did you mean it or was that just to get him off your back?"

She smirks. "I'm mulling."

"Meaning?"

"That I'm mulling."

"Don't do it," he says suddenly.

"What?"

"The dude's name is _Leslie_, Addison!" Alex exclaims. It sounds like he's just managed to think of that excuse.

"So?"

"So… so his name is Leslie!"

"You're just jealous," Addison smirks.

"W-what? No. I'm not jealous. Don't be stupid."

"You're jealous that I have a date and you don't," Addison continues. If she were paying attention, she'd notice that he relaxes just slightly. But she's not paying attention. She's too busy teasing him.

"Fine, Addison, do whatever," he says.

"Hey, you okay?" she frowns.

"I'm fine," he says.

"You sure?"

"Yeah," he replies. "I just… I'm happy. For you."

"Well, if you're sure," she says, standing up and starting to walk away.

"Addison."

She whips around and is almost disgusted with how much she wants him to tell her not to go out with Leslie and give her a better reason than that his name is Leslie. "Y-yeah?"

He looks like he's about to say one thing but changes his mind and says another. "I'm glad you got the job."

She smiles, this time without teeth, and tucks her hair behind her ear. "Thanks," she says, even though all she really wants to do is scream at him to give her a reason to tell the principal that she can't.

0ooo0

"So," Emerson starts with a sly grin as Addison opens the door. "How'd the interview with Leslie go?"

"It was fine," Addison says calmly. She's not giving anything away. That grin easily gives away the fact that Emerson is expecting some sort of reaction.

"Oh. Good."

Emerson sounds disappointed so Addison decides to throw the poor woman a bone. "It would have been nice to know that Leslie's a guy."

The marshal grins. "Sorry about that," she says, not sounding anywhere _near _sorry. "I just got off of the phone with him, actually. He seems quite taken with you."

"Taken with me?" Addison asks, quirking an eyebrow. Why do the people she knows in this new life talk so weird?

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, um, he sort of asked me out," Addison says quietly.

Emerson's eyes pop. "Are you serious?"

"Um, yeah.

"I told him not to do that," Emerson grumbles.

"What? Why not?"

"I told him you were new in town and that you were just trying to settle in. And that you probably didn't need the distraction. I mean, there _is _the trial and just getting used to everything and-"

Addison cuts her off. "I get the feeling that you don't want me to go out with him."

"No, it's not that. I just… I don't want anybody to get hurt."

"What?" Addison asks, tilting her head to the side. "It's just a date. Not an engagement or something."

"I'm not talking about you or Leslie," Emerson says cryptically. "I think you two would be a g_reat _couple."

"Well, then who-"

"You know what? Forget I said anything," Emerson insists. "I'm talking without thinking again."

Addison raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything.

"Anyways," Emerson exhales, "is there anything you need?"

0ooo0

"So what are you doing tonight?" Addison asks as she shakes out her hair to let the soft waves cascade down her back.

"I don't know," Alex replies.

She sighs noisily. "Are you _ever _going to get out of this apartment?" she nags.

"I go to work every day," he points out. He's started working at an auto shop and all the high school auto shop classes are finally paying off. It's something he's surprisingly good at and he actually enjoys it.

"That doesn't count. Go do something with some guys from the shop or something. Get some dinner. Go to a movie. Hell, go to a freaking strip club for all I care. Just go _do _something." She bites her lip prettily and looks away from him. "I worry about you," she says quietly.

"I'm fine, Addison."

"Will you at least go get a drink or something?"

"Addison, if I _wanted _a lifetime of you nagging at me, I'd put a ring on your finger. You're late for your date. Quit bugging me," he snaps.

"Fine. _Whatever_," she spits back, throwing her hands up in defeat. "Wouldn't want to delay Alex McCarthy from his date with the television. Get a life, Alex."

"Leave me alone."

"Grow up." She shoots him one last nasty look before grabbing her purse and slamming the door on the way out.

0ooo0

"Hey, you okay?" Leslie asks when she sits down at the table.

"Fine," she answers, flashing her teeth in what is probably in the running for the least genuine smile ever.

"Okay, I've talked to you maybe three times total and even _I _can tell that you're lying."

"It's nothing. I just got in a stupid fight with my roommate," she says. It feels weird to call Alex her roommate.

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"He just won't get out of the house and it's driving me insane."

"_He_? You live with a guy?"

"It's just a convenience thing," she assures him hurriedly. "Is that a problem?"

"No, it's just that when Emerson mentioned that you lived with an Alex…"

"You automatically assumed it was short for Alexandra?" Addison finishes. Then she grins—a real smile this time. "Are you sure you're in the position to be making that assumption, _Leslie_?"

"Hey, I didn't say I was _right_, just that I'm incredibly handsome."

Addison laughs at that. "You're right," she giggles. "You're man candy. And I'm sure your students all appreciate it."

"I'm hoping that _you'll _appreciate it soon," he says. Addison stares at him, trying to figure out whether or not that was a serious statement. He laughs nervously. "And that was my lame pick up line for the night. I try to practice them whenever I get near a pretty woman."

"It was a nice try," Addison comforts him, although she's trying not to blush, leaning across the table to pat his hand. "You're welcome to try all the lame pick up lines you want on me. I'm not saying that they're going to _work, _but you can try."

He laughs. "Thanks. It means a lot."

When Addison looks down at the table she notices that they're holding hands. She doesn't move her hand.

0ooo0

When Alex wakes up in the morning he's grumpy as a teenager just woken from a nap. He fell asleep on the couch the night before, not exactly waiting for Addison to come home but not exactly _not _waiting for her either. Then he notices that he has a blanket thrown over him that wasn't there the night before. And that cheers him up just a little bit because at least it's something that says that maybe he and Addison aren't fighting anymore.

He gets up and goes to her room to ask her about her date went. He knocks softly on the door but gets no answer so he opens the door slowly. Addison's there, asleep, but she's not alone. Neither Addison nor the man he assumes to be the femininely named Leslie stir as he closes the door, this time not careful about any noise he might make.

* * *

**Enjoy? Yes? No? In between?**

**-Juli-**


	6. Give You Hell

**Hey! Thanks to everybody still reviewing. They still mean more to me than most people could understand. So thanks!**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

Leslie stays for breakfast but Alex only introduces himself and then makes himself scarce. Addison makes pancakes and Leslie claims that they're amazing, although she knows he's over exaggerating because they don't seem to have any vanilla in the house and everybody knows that's what makes a really good pancake. He kisses her as he leaves and promises to call soon. She smiles and watches him go.

Then she puts some of the leftover pancakes on a plate with butter and syrup and takes it to Alex's door. She knocks and he tells her to come in. He's disinterestedly flipping through a sports magazine. "I figured you'd be hungry," Addison says as she enters. "You know, since you locked yourself in your room for breakfast and all."

He rolls his eyes subtly but she catches it. "So that was Leslie," he comments, grabbing the food from her.

"Yeah."

"He seemed… nice." The way he says nice clearly states that this isn't a compliment.

It's Addison's turn to roll her eyes. "He is. I like him."

"Clearly," Alex snorts.

"What was that?" she snaps.

"Well, you clearly like the guy if you're putting out on the first date. Unless it was some perverted job requirement. There are other ways to get hired you know, Addison?"

Her hand shoots out and slaps him across the face before he gets the last syllable of her name out of his mouth. Then she turns on her heel and storms out of the apartment for the second time in twelve hours.

0ooo0

She wanders around downtown Sacramento for hours instead of going back to the apartment. She just can't bring herself to go back and face Alex. What is his problem lately? Well, he'd better get over whatever it is quickly because she's sick and tired of grumpy Alex. She wants the man who massages her feet and lets her sleep in his bed when she's homesick back. She feels bad about slapping him but he deserved it. There had been times before this, mostly back in Seattle, when her hand had just been itching to smack some sense into him but she had never actually done it. Whatever. As far as she's concerned, Alex Karev or Alex McCarthy or whatever can go rot in hell.

She goes shopping and then sees a movie around five, just to prolong the Alex-free experience. The movie is ridiculously long but she doesn't notice. In fact, she honestly couldn't tell you what happened at all. She's too busy fuming to pay attention to the film. By the time she gets home, it's nearly eight thirty and all she really wants to do is collapse in bed.

She doesn't announce her presence because she's still mad at Alex, although by now she'd probably accept an apology if he offered it. Instead of peaceful sleep or an apology, she nearly gets a bruise as she runs into a blonde woman exiting the bathroom, too busy buttoning her shirt to avoid Addison.

"Who the hell are you?" the mystery woman asks. Addison decides that she's absolutely hateful.

"I _live _here." She doesn't elaborate on that statement and the woman blushes.

"Jenny, what's going on?" Alex asks, coming out of the bathroom.

"It's Janie," the woman corrects him. "And this chick says she lives here."

"She does," he says easily. "She's my roommate."

Addison scoffs and slams her door on the way into her room. Well, she's seriously pissed. He brought some random woman into _her _apartment. And he doesn't even know her name! And he relegated Addison to roommate! And it's just… It's not okay. Nothing about this is okay.

She listens to the pair argue outside of her door and rolls her eyes. She's not jealous. She just doesn't want some random woman in her house. She's glad he got out of the place but did he really have to pick up some woman and bring her back here? But she's not jealous. At all. She's just pissed because he's just reminded of her why she swore that she would never, ever like him. He's everything about Mark Sloan that she _doesn't _like and nothing she does.

Okay, so he has his moments. Moments when he comes up with the exact right thing to say to her. Moments when he opens up about his family. Moments when he just gives her this one _look_, one that reminds her that she's not going through this alone. But she still hates him. Even more so now.

She hears the front door close and then hears Alex's heavy footsteps. She's already sitting in a defensive position by the time her bedroom door swings open. "What was _that_ all about?" he asks.

"What was what about?"

"So it's okay for _you_ to have sex here but not me? What am I saying? Of course that's right, because the world revolves around Addison Forbes Montgomery!"

"Stop being five," she snarls. "Excuse me if I don't want _random _women in my apartment!"

"She's not random," he says.

"_I _don't know her."

"Oh, and I know Leslie?"

"That's different."

"How? How is that _any _different?"

"Because at least I get his name right!" Addison exclaims.

"Look, Jenny is-"

"Her name is _Janie_! I can't believe you slept with someone named _Janie_!"

"You slept with some dude named _Leslie_, Addison! I don't think you get to talk!"

"At least I know his _name_!"

"And not much else," he grumbles.

"_What_?"

"You slept with him on the first date, Addison!"

She rolls her eyes. "That's my business, not yours."

"You had sex while I was sleeping on the couch in the next room. I'm making it my business."

"Oh you were out cold," she snaps.

"I knew it," he mumbles under his breath.

"What?"

"The blanket. It was just so you could check to make sure I wouldn't hear you screaming."

She grinds her teeth. "You're disgusting."

"But I'm right."

"_No_, you're not. I just… I... I didn't want you to get cold," she admits to the floor.

"What?"

"Yeah, but now I wish that you had frozen to death!" she spits out, another flare of anger overtaking her.

To her surprise, he actually calms down instead of matching her stroke for stroke. "What's going on with you?" he asks.

"What?"

"The Addison I know wouldn't sleep with someone on the first date."

"Well, maybe you don't know me anymore."

"I don't think I do."

"I think you're right."

"And I don't like the new you."

She motions towards her door. "You can leave any time you'd like."

He glares at her and leaves, not bothering to close her door so she can see him stride out of the apartment.

She takes a deep breath and exhales, collapsing back onto her bed, officially exhausted.

0ooo0

It's four thirty in the morning and Addison's still awake. She hasn't been able to sleep at all. Alex hasn't come home yet and he won't pick up his phone and she really doesn't like that. She's still furious with him, but… he's kind of all she has right now, pissy or not. So she's allowed to be a little worried.

And then she gets to thinking. If they were back in Seattle, she wouldn't be worried at all (although she can't come up with a reason why they'd be living together back in Seattle). She'd just assume he ended up going home with some chick or something. But they're not in Seattle, they're in Sacramento, and they now have people who want them dead.

Before she thinks too much (and later she'll blame it on a sleep deprived fog in her mind), she picks up the phone and calls Emerson. "Uh?" Emerson groans into the phone as she picks up.

'Alex hasn't come home," Addison says.

"Hm?"

"Alex isn't home and it's four thirty and he's always home," Addison rambles.

"Did he tell you where he was going?" The marshal still sounds like she's half-asleep, but Addison can hear the official switch flipping on in her brain.

"No, we, um, we had a fight," Addison blushes and then silently curses herself for blushing.

"Have you tried his phone?"

"He won't answer," Addison replies. She tries to keep any and all worst case scenarios out of her head but there's really too many of them for her barricade to stand and a couple leak through.

"Let me try. I'll call you back." Emerson hangs up.

Her phone rings two minutes later. "He didn't pick up," Emerson says when Addison picks up on the first ring. "I'm going to call Graham and see if he's heard anything, okay?"

"Okay," Addison agrees unhappily. One worst case scenario made it past her dam and now they're all flooding out. She's trying to keep the idea of a bloody and battered Alex out of her head and it's not working. At all.

Five terrifying minutes go by before her phone rings. Once again, she picks up on the first ring. "He's at Graham's," Emerson says.

"What?"

"He's staying tonight at Graham's. Graham said that he mumbled something about psycho women and asked to stay the night. He's safe, Addison. You should get some sleep."

"Yeah, okay."

The two women hang up and Addison drifts off to sleep, this time trying not to notice the distinct empty feeling the apartment has without him in the other room.

0ooo0

He comes wandering in at approximately nine in the morning. At approximately nine minutes and twelve seconds, Addison comes barreling into him and her hand makes contact with his chest as she shoves him. "Where the _hell _were you?" she screeches.

"Graham's place," he says easily. "It's nice."

"Don't _ever _do that again, Alex Karev," she orders him. "I could kill you right now. Do you know how worried I was?"

He just smirks and she continues ranting. "I got less than four hours of sleep because of you. I could _kill _you! I thought you were _dead _or dying or something! I could so kill you!"

The smirk is strong through his next question. "So you were worried?"

"I swear to God, Alex Karev, if you ever so much as think about doing that again I will punch you in the teeth so hard your dentist will wake up. Do not _ever _do that to me again. Understand?"

"I'm not your intern anymore, Addison. You can't order me around."

She grabs a fistful of his shirt and pulls him within an inch of her face. "Do. You. Understand?" she growls, a menacing pause between each word.

He gulps. That is not the face of somebody you mess with. "Yeah."

"Good," she says and lets go of his shirt. And promptly stops crying. She blames the fact that she got four hours of sleep. "I thought… I thought you were dead," she whispers.

He gathers her into a hug for several different reasons. A) She needs it. B) When he comforts her that he's just fine, she can actually feel that he's perfectly solid. And C) He just plain likes the feeling of her in his arms.

She calms down and smacks him in the chest again. "Do not _ever_ do that to me again, Alex. I mean it."

He reaches up and gently cups her face in his hands. "I _won't_," he says emphatically. They stay like that for a very long time until Addison nods stiffly and mumbles some excuse to go back to her room.

* * *

**Thoughts? Opinions? Joys? Concerns?**

**-Juli-**


	7. My Best Friend

**Hola. Sorry this took so long. I sort of lost the writing bug for a moment there. I'm **_**trying **_**to be better about it. I don't know how successful I will be, but let's not think about that now, shall we? **

**Anyways, Gigi picked the end of this chapter, so if you absolutely hate it, blame her. And the time difference, which nobody but Gigi is going to get, but whatever.**

**And I still own nothing but my mind.**

* * *

"Hey, you going to be okay today?" Alex asks as they navigate around each other in the kitchen.

Addison grabs two mugs and pours coffee into them, handing one to him. "Alex, I'm working at a high school. It's not my first day of kindergarten."

"Sorry."

"I'm not five," she smiles. "But it's sweet that you're worried about me."

"I'm not worried about you," he says.

"You're worried about me."

"I'm not."

"Are too."

"I'm not."

"You are too!"

"And you're claiming that you're _not _five?"

She glares at him. "I have to go," she announces. And then just to spite him, even though she has a perfectly good cup of coffee in her hand, she grabs his cup and takes a deep drink. And then she grins and strides away before he can react.

0ooo0

Red. Addison wades her way through a sea of red. Red polo shirts, red cardigans, red sweatshirts, red jackets. Here and there a white polo. The navy blue skirts.

Addison had made it through her schooling without a single uniform. And now she's making her way through almost a thousand teenage girls screaming, talking, giggling all dressed in red and blue, the school's colors.

She nearly runs into two girls running through the hallway and avoiding them nearly sends her into an open locker. "Excuse me," she apologizes to the girl she almost flattened.

"No problem," the girl replies, looking up from her search through her backpack. Then she turns away from Addison and shouts down the hallway, "Does anybody have a tampon?"

To Addison's surprise, four different girls quickly proffer the requested item. The girl grabs the nearest one. "Hey, thanks," she smiles. "I owe you one."

"No problem."

"What's your name?"

"Emily."

"Well, thanks."

Addison walks away from the exchange, only to encounter the same scene four more times before reaching her classroom. It's clearly a commonplace thing to see in this land of estrogen. Even the male teachers she sees in the halls don't flinch at the words tampon, pad, or period. She's impressed and wonders how many years it took them to desensitize themselves to the nearly always effective feminine issues.

She manages to find the room and enters warily. She met Mrs. Hunt a few days ago, but that doesn't mean that she's met the students.

"Hello, dear," Mrs. Hunt greets her as she pushes the door open.

"Hello, Anne," she greets the older woman, who would flip if she called her anything but her first name.

"Dear, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to remind me of your name."

"Addison."

"Right. I'm sorry. I've always been bad with names."

Tact tells Addison not to point out that the woman is well over retirement age and has that excuse working for her too. "You're thinking that I'm probably too old to be teaching," Anne accuses her conversationally. "But once you meet the girls, you'll understand. It's difficult to pry yourself away from them."

Addison smiles, but is saved from answering by the small mob of teenage girls that push through the door. "Alright, girls," Mrs. Hunt speaks up. "There's a seating chart on the overhead. Please figure out where you sit."

0ooo0

The break room is empty as she pours herself a cup of coffee. She takes a sip and it's not very good, but she's used to crappy coffee. As she turns to sit down to rest her feet, she sees Leslie heading her way. "Ms. Todd," he says formally. "How has your first day been so far?"

She opens her mouth to respond, but he looks around the room, sees no one, wraps an arm around her waist and pulls her close. He leans in to kiss her but lightning-fast reflexes allow her to shove a hand up between their lips. "What are you doing?" she asks, her lips rubbing against the back of her hand.

"Kissing you," he says simply.

"Do you really think that's the best idea? On my first day, Boss?"

"Okay, then," he replies easily. "I'm not kissing you."

"What do you call this then?"

"Very close talking."

Addison laughs and extricates herself from his arms. "Clever. Not happening, but clever."

"Would you like to do some very close talking later?" he questions and she laughs again.

"Maybe, if you come over tonight."

"Your roommate doesn't like me very much," Leslie points out warily.

"Alex? He doesn't _not _like you. He just doesn't know you," Addison responds, waving away his point with a dismissive flick of the wrist.

"No, I'm pretty sure he hates me."

"He can't hate you if he doesn't know you," Addison sighs. "Come over tomorrow night and have dinner. I'll make Alex cook. You haven't lived until you've tasted his food."

"I don't know," Leslie shies away from the suggestion. Addison shoots him a look that says very clearly if he doesn't agree to it, there will be no talking any time soon, of the close variety or otherwise. "Fine. Okay. But he kind of looks like he could kill me and I kind of think he would if he got the chance."

"Oh, don't be such a baby," Addison snaps. She just wants Leslie, whatever he is, to get along with Alex, who, at this moment in time, she would have to classify as her best friend. And if neither of them are going to make the effort, then, by God, she will _make _them make an effort.

0ooo0

The next day comes and goes in a blur. Addison gives Alex heads up that he will be cooking for three, and after only slight cajoling, he agrees—although mostly just to get her to shut up. Addison finds herself liking the general din of the classroom. She mostly just sits in back and observes for now, but later she'll start taking the reins from Mrs. Hunt. For now, she's getting paid to sit in a sort of peaceful reverie and that's not bad at all.

"I don't understand why you're so set on me liking Leslie," Alex grumbles as he cracks eggs, having decided that they should have breakfast for dinner and therefore making omelets.

"Because it would just be nice if you could like each other, okay?" Addison replies from her careful perch on the counter.

"Hand me the flour," he orders, gesturing towards the stuff.

"I thought we were having omelets?"

"And pancakes. You can make them, instead of just sitting around and looking pretty."

She pulls her hair lazily up off her neck. "I would have to move to do that."

"Yes you would," he agrees.

"I don't want to," she states.

"Get your ass off the counter and get to work," he commands.

"No."

She stares at him defiantly, daring him to do something about her refusal. He holds eye contact, slips his hand into the flour and then wipes it on her left cheek. Her mouth drops open. "Oh, I _know _you didn't just do that," she says, eyes widened in shock.

Instead of answering, her right cheek receives the same treatment. "I am going to freaking murder you, Alex!" she practically screams, snatching the flour from him, taking a handful and smashing it in his face. They wrestle over the jar that contains the powder and somehow Alex' arms end up wrapped around her as he tries to grab it from her hands and she tries to prevent that very thing from happening. She reaches in, takes more flour and wipes it on his nose. Before she can get that second hand back onto the jar, he grabs it, overpowering her, and dumps a large portion of it on her head. She whips around and whacks him in the sternum. He grunts as he registers the pain. "That seemed like a good idea to you?" she shrieks, attempting to shake the flour out of her hair.

"Ow!" he exclaims.

She glares. "Oh, you so deserved that."

The doorbell rings before he can respond. She gives him yet another glare and goes to get Leslie.

0ooo0

After the first five minutes, the atmosphere in the apartment becomes tense. And that makes sense. Addison is in the room for the first five minutes and then excuses herself to go wash baking ingredients out of her hair. So then it's just Alex and Leslie. And that's awkward.

"Look, I really do like her. Addison, I mean," Leslie says randomly after a good five minutes of Alex alternately cooking and glaring at him.

"Uh-huh," Alex replies disinterestedly, turning his attention to the stove.

"I mean, I guess she's just different or something. There's something about her." Leslie is just rambling. He's never been very good at silence.

Alex slams the spatula down and turns around. "She's my best friend," he informs the other man. "She's been through a lot. And if you hurt her, I _will _kill you."

"I won't," Leslie says sincerely, with a little nervous laugh. "I don't want to."

"Uh-huh," Alex responds skeptically.

"I mean that."

"Uh-huh."

Fortunately for Leslie's little one-sided ramble, Addison comes back into the room, her hair still damp from the shower. "What did I miss?" she asks.

"Nothing," Alex says, turning back to the food. "Dinner's ready."

0ooo0

Later that night, Leslie goes home, and Addison and Alex clean up the mess that is their kitchen, then go to sleep. Alex is almost asleep when his bedroom door opens and Addison pads in.

"Scoot over," she commands. He does as he's told and she slips into bed with him.

"What's up?" he asks, slightly groggy.

"What did you think of tonight? Did you like Leslie? Do you hate him? What?"

"Why do you want my opinion?"

"Because," she stammers quietly. "I- I want my best friend to like the guy I'm dating."

He pretends that her statement doesn't warm his stomach just a little. "I think he's a good guy," he answers. "He'll be good for you."

She nods. "Okay." She rolls so her back is to him. "Goodnight."

"You're not sleeping in your bed?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"Because shut up, Alex. That's why."

And that's logic that he really can't argue with so he closes his eyes and goes to sleep.

* * *

**So, yeah, if you hated it blame Gigi and the time difference. Not me. (Nothing is ever my fault!)**

**-Juli-**


	8. Wrong About Me

**I want to thank iamkelly, LGCoffeeAddict, and Kate811 for CONSTANTLY showering me with probably undeserved praise and consistently reviewing, even if it takes awhile for it to happen. The fact that it happens at all means SO much to me.**

**In other news, I really, really, really hope you like this chapter.**

**And I own nothing. Still.**

* * *

She wakes up earlier than usual the next morning. She always sleeps on her side in a loose fetal position and last night was no exception. This morning, however, she wakes up with Alex curled around her protectively, his arm wrapped around her waist. It becomes very clear that she's not making out of his embrace without waking him up and that could get awkward. In fact, she can only think of one way to get out of this without any awkwardness at all. So, with a silent apology to Alex, she elbows him in the stomach.

He grunts as air is forced out of his lungs. "Ow," he groans.

"Let go," Addison demands, squirming out of his hold. "I have to pee."

He keeps his arm wrapped around her waist and doesn't let go.

"Alex, I swear to God, if you don't let me go, I'll hurt you."

"You're really violent lately," he comments.

"We can talk about my anger problems later," Addison replies. "Right now, I really have to pee, so if you'll please remove your arm from my waist, I won't have to kill you."

There's a slight hesitation before he does as he's asked, probably because he's convincing himself not to give her a smartass retort.

0ooo0

For the next month, things go smoothly. Alex does his best to not hate Leslie. He starts dating, although the women rarely make it past two dates and Addison hates them all on sight (though, to her credit, she doesn't say anything). Addison starts going to class to get her credentials on top of working at the school. It's a lot, but she manages.

She's getting in the car to go home when her phone rings. "Hey," she smiles, picking up.

"Hey," Alex greets her. "You want pizza?"

"Pizza?"

"I was going to grab some on my way home. You want some?"

"Is that even a question?" she laughs.

"Pepperoni and olives, like usual?" he confirms. "Wait, why am I even asking that? It never changes."

"Shut up, Alex. And thanks."

"No problem. I'll see you in a minute."

0ooo0

She hops in the shower the moment she gets home, wanting to wash the grime off before Alex gets home with food.

Humming, she allows the water to pound her back. It's really quite peaceful, until she hears the door to the bathroom creak. She looks through the glass door of the shower and sees Alex, looking rather dumbfounded. She screams and does her best to cover herself. "Turn around!" she exclaims. He obeys automatically.

"Oh, I, um, I…" Alex stammers as he turns.

"Ever hear of this thing called knocking, Alex?"

"I'm sorry, I just…"

"Get out!" Alex hastens to do as he's told, and Addison hurries to finish showering, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

She makes sure to get completely dressed before exiting the bathroom, suddenly very glad she had chosen a T-shirt and pants, so that she's pretty conservatively covered. The second that she's out of the bathroom, Alex starts apologizing.

"Addison, I am so sorry, I didn't mean to… you know."

She shakes her head. "It's- it's fine."

"I mean, in my defense, the door was open."

"The door wasn't open!" she exclaims. "Even though I was home alone, I would have closed the door."

"Well, it was open. Not all the way, but it was definitely open."

"And the sound of water running didn't tip you off?"

"I had my iPod in. I'm really sorry, but it was just one of those things. You get that, right?"

Addison sighs. "Yeah, I get that."

"Good. Now hurry up and eat. The pizza got here five minutes ago, and that's five minutes of cooling off time."

She laughs, glad that he's making the effort to keep things from being awkward. "You had better not have touched this pizza, Alex Karev, because if there is so much as one pepperoni out of place, so help me God…"

They laugh together and dig in to their food.

0ooo0

By an unspoken agreement, they agree to not mention the fact that he's seen her naked. They don't intentionally start avoiding each other, but Addison's busy with her credentials, and her job, and Leslie, and Alex starts working more, so they just don't see much of each other anymore. In fact, the only time they interact is in the mornings, pre-coffee. And they barely talk then.

Things start to change one day while Addison is at Leslie's place. She gets out of bed to get a drink of water, not bothering to get dressed to do so. Well, he's her boyfriend, it's not like he hasn't seen it before, and there's nobody else around. She doesn't expect to get berated. But she gets berated.

"Wait, let me get this straight," she frowns. "You want me to… put my clothes _on_? Normally it's the other way around."

"No, I don't want you to put clothes on," he stammers. "I just want you to cover up."

"Why? We're alone."

"I just don't like the idea of other people seeing you naked." People means guys when you factor in his tone.

She rolls her eyes. "Believe me; plenty of other people have seen me naked." Normally she really wouldn't push this issue, but she can't _stand _jealousy, especially when it has a hand in trying to tell her what to do. Plus, she's felt this sort of itchy, grating irritation with Leslie lately—for being safe, for being boring, and, though she'd never actually think this, mind you, for not being Alex.

"I don't think about that," he says.

The itchy irritation flares into an active, burning anger. "A bunch of guys have seen me naked, Leslie! So what? It's not that special! I was freaking ma-" She stops herself before she blurts out that she was married. Addison Forbes Montgomery was married. Addison Todd has never been married. Ever. "A lot of guys have seen me, and you need to deal with it."

"Has Alex?" She _hates _the resentful tone in his voice.

"Don't make this about him. Leslie, I _want _to make this work with you, but not when you're like this. And not like you're thinking, but yes, he has."

He studies her carefully. "You're not telling me something," he states.

_Yeah, no shit, Sherlock_, she thinks bitterly before lying, "I've told you everything I can."

"You're lying to me. I can tell."

"This is ridiculous," she spits.

"You've slept with him," he accuses her.

_After all the lies I've told you, you choose to MAKE ONE UP?_ "If by sleeping with, you mean literally sleeping in the same bed, then yes, I have slept with him," she says, reaching that terrifying point of absolute calm. "But if you think I've had sex with him, you're completely off base and out of line."

The couple stare at each other, jaws locked, fists clenched, waiting for the next move.

0ooo0

Alex is almost asleep when his door opens and Addison pads towards his bed. "Scoot over," she demands and he does immediately as he's asked. She slides into bed with him for the first time since he saw her in the shower.

"You okay?" he asks, frowning when she immediately turns onto her side, facing away from him.

There's silence for a moment and he can feel her body start to quiver. Finally she announces, "Leslie broke up with me."

* * *

**I'm not begging for reviews, but thoughts would be really, really appreciated. I really do love hearing feedback. Ah, hell, objectively, even though I'm trying to be nice and classy about it, I'm begging for reviews. Okay, I admit it. I'm a review whore. Let he who has not sinned throw the first stone and all that whatnot.**

**-Juli-**

**PS I love the word "whatnot", don't you?**


	9. Ring of Fire

**Haha. Hello. Don't mind me... It definitely has not been a while. Nope. Not. At. All. Well, enjoy anyways.**

**Kate, I hope you laugh. It made me smile.**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

When she announces that, Alex tenses up as four thoughts run through his head nearly simultaneously. First, _I'm going to kill him_. Second, _Is she going to be okay? _Third, _She has to be okay. She's Addison; of course she'll be okay. _And last, but not least, _She's single._

"Addison, I-"

"No, I don't… I just… it sucks, you know?" she cuts him off quietly, refusing any comfort he may offer.

"What happened?" he asks and winces when he hears just how his question came out.

"We got into a stupid fight and I said that I didn't want to be around him when he was like that and he told me to get out because he was done." Her voice is flat, intending to hide all emotion and conveying way more than she's comfortable with.

"What were you fighting about?"

She turns to face him and he's surprised to see that she's managed to get control over her tears. "You, actually. He wouldn't believe that we haven't slept together." She gives him a tiny smile that's somehow more heartbreaking than the tears. "It was stupid."

"Addison, are you okay?"

She sighs heavily. "I'm not sure. I think everything's just catching up to me at once."

He can feel the anger start to flare up at Leslie for ever making her cry. He remembers his threat. "I'll kill him," he growls.

"No, Alex, please… Just… Can you…"

"What?" he asks quietly, calming down as her resolve starts to break. She turns back away from him. He wraps his arm around her waist protectively.

She takes a shaky breath. "Just do exactly that," she breathes, her eyes starting to drift closed.

He shifts so he's closer to her and pulls her close to him. "I've got you, Adds," he promises. But she's already started to drift off to sleep.

0ooo0

Addison spends the next few days playing the game called Avoidance. She's avoiding Leslie at work, and though she doesn't do it on purpose, she's avoiding Alex at home. The Leslie thing is terribly obvious—she's peering around corners and staying away from the faculty lounge. The Alex thing is more subtle. Nothing outwardly seems to change, but she avoids telling him about her day and tries not to think about how all she needed to get over Leslie was an innocent night of sleep in Alex' bed.

A couple of nights later, Addison catches Alex getting dressed up nicer than usual. "You going somewhere?" she asks, a slight frown on her lips.

He turns to look at her briefly. "I have a date tonight."

Her eyes widen in surprise. "You have a date? Really?"

"No," he says, rolling his eyes. "I'm lying to you."

She smirks, glad they're still their same sarcastic selves. "Do you know this one's name at least?"

He glares. "Yes. Her name is Ronnette."

Addison bursts out laughing, hard as she might try to hold it in.

"I don't see what's so funny," he grumbles.

"Alex," she giggles, appalled that she actually feels tears of mirth forming her eyes. "What the _hell _is a Ronnette?"

He grins back. "Like you can talk, Miss Leslie Dater."

"That' s a horrible nickname," she insists with a smile. "I refuse to answer to that. Mr. Ronnette. What's the masculine form of that? Ron? Can I call you Ronald?"

"_No_," he declares.

"I'm going to call you Ronald from now on. You are now Ronald to me. Ronald and Ronnette!"

Instead of answering, he rushes across the room to scoop her up and dump her screaming, laughing, kicking body on his bed. And then he starts tickling her mercilessly, which only causes more flailing.

Finally, when she's screaming for mercy, his bed is as messed up as if they had just had sex, and he realizes that he's officially late for his date, he stops. "I have to go," he explains, getting up.

She follows him to the door. "Have fun on your date… Ronald." She slams the door shut before he can yell at her or tickle her anymore. She leans her back against the door, trying not to think about the fact that, even though that was the most fun she's had in awhile, she almost wishes they had messed up his bed the other way.

0ooo0

Addison stirs as she hears the door open quietly. "Alex?" she whispers, although she's not exactly sure why she's whispering.

"Hey," he says quietly as he comes into the room. "You're up."

"I was watching a movie," she yawns, pretending that she wasn't waiting up for him.

"Any good?" he asks, the slightest smirk playing on his face because he notices the television is off and the remote is across the room from Addison.

She can see she's been caught in a lie and doesn't even _try _to come up with a cover. "It had a beginning, a middle, and an end. How was your date?"

He motions for her to sit up so he can sit next to her. She does and lays her head on his shoulder and the only reason she does that is because she's half-asleep. "It had a beginning, a middle, and an end," he parrots her.

"Not good?"

He laughs and drapes an arm loosely around her shoulder. She scoots a little closer to him. "She was kind of crazy. Reminded me of you," he grins.

She smacks him. "Not nice."

"And slapping me is?"

"No," she admits. "But you started it!" She can feel his chest move as he chuckles and she shivers. "You'll find someone, Alex. Someone who just… gets you." She looks up and smiles gently at him.

"Was Leslie that for you?" he asks quietly.

"Clearly not," she answers with a little laugh. "Still looking for that one."

"You'll find someone," he says.

She looks up and smiles at him. "You're just repeating me all over the place tonight, aren't you?" she teases, lightly tapping his chest.

"You're just getting violent all over the place tonight, aren't you?" he replies with a smile.

"Oh, be quiet."

"Make me," he smirks.

She quirks an eyebrow and it looks like she's about to say something. But all of a sudden she stretches up and presses her lips to his. She's happy to feel his lips start to move against hers and his tongue slip into her mouth.

When she starts to fumble with his belt though, he pulls away. "What?" she breathes.

"You sure?" he asks, searching her face and eyes for anything that might betray that she's not a hundred percent okay with this. She bites her lip and nods. "You're really sure?"

"Alex."

"Yeah?"

"Stop talking."

He doesn't have to be told twice.

0ooo0

She wakes up the next morning, trying to ignore the fact that she slept next to a very naked Alex Karev last night. So she gets up, gets dressed, and pours herself a bowl of cereal, retreating to her room before he can wake up. Except within five minutes of her closing her door, Alex opens it, thankfully fully clothed.

She looks up from her bowl. "Hi," she says quietly.

"Hey."

There's an awkward silence that is only highlighted and underlined in bright red pen by the crunching of the cereal in Addison's mouth. "Want some cereal?" she asks eventually.

"Nah, I'm good," he says.

She shrugs, "Suit yourself."

"Look, about last night," they start in unison.

"Go ahead," Addison grants after they laugh nervously.

"No, you were going to say something. You go."

She takes a deep breath. "Last night was… amazing. But I just… You're my best friend, Alex. And what we have, it works. And I don't want to mess with that."

"So what you're saying is that last night…"

"Was fantastic and something we both needed, but… it shouldn't have happened. And it probably shouldn't happen again. Am I making sense?"

"No. No, I get it," he agrees. "Couldn't agree more. You're right. It was just…"

"A release," Addison finishes for him.

"Right?"

"We're okay though, right?" Addison asks nervously. "I mean, you're not mad at me or anything?"

"No. Why would I be mad at you?"

"I- I don't know. I'm being stupid. So we're good?"

"We're good," he confirms.

"Good."

"We're all good."

"Good. That's… good."

More silence. Addison tries not to scream at him for not fighting her on this decision. Finally she shatters the silence. "Do you want waffles? I could totally go for some right now. I'll make them."

"What about your cereal?"

She waves her hand. "Not real food. Doesn't count. So waffles?"

He laughs at her quirky view on food. "I'm not going to say no."

"Good!"

* * *

**The ending is all Gigi's fault. Blame her. :P**

**I love hearing things!**

**-Juli-**


	10. Green and Blue

**Hey! Sorry it's been so long. This college thing is way more time consuming than you would think! Anyways, sorry this is short. I wanted to stop it where I did for reasons known to me, but unfortunately that means the chapter is short. Hopefully I can update in a more timely manner next time though! So, anyways, enjoy!**

**I own nothing. Absolutely nothing.**

* * *

Addison has been avoiding the break room pretty studiously since breaking up with Leslie. But now she's desperate for coffee and he _should _be off principal-ing or something. So she decides to brave the break room.

That was a bad decision and she knows it within moments. The room is crowded with other teachers and the second she reaches the coffee maker she feels a body slide up next to her. "Look, can we talk?" She doesn't need to look to know that the voice in her ear belongs to Leslie.

Since she doesn't need to look, she focuses on pouring her cup coffee while she retorts, "What is there to talk about?"

"Addison, I'm sorry, okay? I just… I wasn't thinking. I just got jealous and stupid. And I didn't think that it would go so far. And I-"

She whips around. "Stop. Talking," she snarls. "There's nothing to talk about."

Leslie looks sad when she says that. "I miss you," he says quietly, ducking his head and walking away.

Addison watches him go.

0ooo0

Addison curls up in the easy chair by the couch. She'd curl up on the couch, but that's where Alex is and even though they're pretending things aren't awkward, they totally are.

"How was your day?" she inquires.

"It was good," he says simply. "What about you?"

"It was fine," she replies.

He gives her the look that sees right through her. "You're lying."

"I'm not."

"You just did it again."

"I'm not lying."

"And again!"

"Alex-"

"Addison, I know when you're lying. Shut up and tell me what happened."

"It's nothing."

"Addison."

"It's nothing. Really."

"Addison, it's not nothing. I'm not some intern you can just brush off anymore! Stop treating me like I am."

Addison flinches. "Leslie misses me," she blurts out.

He freezes.

"Sorry," she apologizes.

"What for?"

"For… I don't know. There's not anything I should be sorry about, right?" She locks eyes with him, hoping for a no, hoping for a yes. Hoping for anything but the docile "nope" she gets.

"I… I think he wants to get back together," she continues.

"What would you do?" he asks carefully. "If he did."

"I… don't know," Addison admits.

"Do you… miss him or whatever?"

Addison looks away from him. "Yeah, I do. I'm still angry, but… Is it okay that we're talking about this?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because of… that." A clear allusion to their one night together.

"Oh."

"Sorry."

"Stop saying that," he snaps suddenly. She's surprised by the amount of feeling he puts into his words. "We agreed it was a mistake. There's nothing to be sorry about. We're friends. That's it. And friends talk about stuff like this, right?"

"Right," she says quietly.

"Addison, whatever you do, just do what makes you happy, okay?" He gives her a small smile to let her know that he's not angry and leaves the room to start dinner.

0ooo0

Addison knocks on the now familiar door. "Hey," she greets.

Leslie looks up from his work. "Hi."

"Hi."

Awkward silence ensues.

"Come in. Sit down," he finally invites, suddenly a flurry of nervous energy as he breaks the silence. Addison does as he asks. "What can I help you with?" he asks, not really sure if this a personal or professional visit.

"You can't do that again," Addison blurts out.

"What?"

"You can't get jealous like that. If this is going to work. You can't be like that. I live with Alex. That's not going to change any time soon."

"So… you want to… get back together?"

"Assuming you're not going to get irrationally jealous and fly off the handle again."

A smile starts to grace his features. "I don't know what happened, Addison. I just… I care. And I hated the idea of anybody else… with you."

"Leslie, you can't think like that, okay? I wasn't a fifteen year old virgin when I met you."

"Thank God for small miracles," he comments with a sly grin. Addison tries to twist her mouth into a frown but that fails and she laughs. "Addison," he says, getting serious again. "I'll try. I promise. I might get a little jealous. But that's just because I didn't learn my lesson in kindergarten very well and I hate sharing. I trust you. It's not about that."

Addison sighs. "Thank you."

"And about you and Alex… If you say nothing happened, nothing happened."'

Addison opens her mouth to say something but he talks over her, wondering if she'd like to grab some lunch.

As they walk out of the office, Addison resolves to never let that particular lie of omission out of the bag.

0ooo0

Two days later, Addison is going to meet Leslie in his office to go get lunch again. But a familiar voice stops her from pushing the door open.

"If you hurt her again, I'll kill you. I didn't because for whatever reason you make her happy. But if you _ever _treat her badly, I won't hesitate to find you. She's… she's the best thing you're going to find on earth, and if she were mine…. Just treat her right, okay? And don't be stupid enough to screw it up and let her go. She's the closest thing you're going to find to perfection. So don't screw up."

Addison doesn't hear Leslie's reply to Alex's rant. She wanders into the lobby of the office and sits down. She's with Leslie, so those words coming out of Alex's mouth shouldn't make her heart race, shouldn't make her mouth dry, shouldn't make her palms sweat, shouldn't turn her legs to Jello. But that's exactly what they do. And all she can hear is an echo of _if she were mine…_


	11. I Am An Illusion

**Hi! I know this is short, but I wanted to put this up and it's mostly just for plot development. And it's late and I'm tired and want to sleep! Enjoy anyways, I hope!**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

"Addison?" Leslie's voice sounds like it's coming from somewhere down a very long, very echo-y tunnel.

Addison shakes off the fog. "Hey, sorry." As she stands, he pulls her in for a kiss. She turns subtly so his lips land on her cheek.

"You okay?" both Alex and Leslie ask.

Addison wants to scream that she is not fine and she won't be fine until she figures out exactly what Alex meant back there, so she says, "Yeah. Fine."

"Do you want to grab some lunch?" Leslie offers.

Addison freezes for no good reason, staring between Alex and Leslie. "I… uh, have to go," Alex stammers, already starting to back away. "Couple of guys from the shop and I are going to get lunch."

"Bye," Addison says quietly.

"Bye."

0ooo0

Addison awkwardly avoids Alex that night at home. All she wants to know is what's going through his head and that's the one thing she doesn't want to find out.

A knock on the door reveals Emerson and Graham. "Emerson! Graham!" Addison exclaims in that too highly pitched voice that betrays her unhappiness.

"We apologize for dropping by unannounced," Graham says.

"The trial date's been set!" Emerson bursts out.

"Weren't we going to ease into that?" Graham wonders.

"What's going on?" Alex asks, coming into the room.

Addison turns to look at Alex for the first time since that afternoon. "The trial date's been set, apparently."

"Oh. When?"

"It's in a couple of weeks." Emerson looks suspiciously between the two. "Is everything alright between the two of you?"

"Emerson, don't pry," Graham chides as both Addison and Alex assure her profusely that absolutely nothing is wrong and why would she even think that something was wrong?

Emerson turns to Graham. "Why? They're my job. It's my job to make sure they're safe and happy. This falls under safe and happy, right?"

"We're fine," Alex says.

"There's absolutely no reason we _wouldn't _be fine," Addison lies. She thinks that Emerson or Graham or even Alex is going to call her on the blatant fib, but it's apparently convincing enough for the marshals and Alex is either oblivious or he keeps his mouth shut.

"Okay, good," Emerson sighs. "I was nervous there for a second! We're going to have to spend a lot of time together, at the office, going over your testimonies with the lawyer people, so I would hate for anything to be awkward!"

"Awkward? Why would anything be awkward?" The lying thing gets easier the more Addison does it.

"So I talked to Leslie," Emerson comments, apparently determined to hop on the awkward train headed straight to Uncomforta-ville. "He said you two got back together?"

"Yeah," Addison answers, picking at a loose thread on her sweater. "We did."

"That's great!" Emerson exclaims. "I'm happy for you! Really."

Because Emerson has such a perky tone, a lot of what she says comes off as insincere. But Addison gets the feeling that this really _is _insincere.

"So, court details," Graham steps in.

0ooo0

In the days that follow, stress just seems to build up in Addison's system. On top of normal life, she's debating what to do about Leslie and what to do about Alex and now there's the trial to worry about. And there's something that just feels wrong that she can't place. It's just a feeling that she has.

She decides to take a long hot shower to de-stress. But that turns out to be a total bust. Instead of de-stressing, it turns out to just be distressing.

She's standing in the shower when she starts doing some mental math, hops out of the shower, wraps a towel around her, sprints for the phone and dials. "Pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up, pick up!" she rants under her breath.

"Hello?"

"Emerson? It's Addison. Are you free?"

"Addison? What's going on? Are you okay?"

"Everything's fine… Just… could you come over?"

"Sure," Emerson agrees slowly.

"Can I ask you another favor?"

"Sure."

"Can you bring a pregnancy test?"

* * *

**Enjoy? Hopefully!**

**-Juli-**


	12. Secret

**I know this is short too, but I wanted to get this out! Plus, it was almost shorter, because I enjoy being mean and leaving chapters in really evil places, but I didn't! So be happy about that.**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

The door swings open within seconds of Emerson knocking for the first time. "I need you to be Callie," Addison babbles, grabbing Emerson's wrist and dragging her inside. "I know you're really more of a Sydney and this might sound weird, but I need you to be Callie."

Emerson blinks. "What?"

"Okay, whatever I say, I need you to oppose it and just act like I'm being stupid. Then be supportive when I start to see your point. That's basically all you need to know to be Callie."

"Addison, I'm standing in your living room, holding a pregnancy test. Can I least know what's going on before I start being people I've never heard of?"

Addison brings her hands to her temples. "Alex and I slept together." Emerson's mouth opens to say something, so Addison rushes on to make sure that she's not attacked by a very peppy marshal. "A couple of days after Leslie and I broke up. He came home from a date one night and he just… it's just… I…"

"And now you're pregnant?"

"Now, I _might _be pregnant. That's what the test is for."

Emerson studies Addison for a minute. "Is it a good or a bad thing?"

"I haven't decided yet!"

"What about Leslie?"

Addison freezes. "I hadn't even thought about it. That probably means something, doesn't it?"

Emerson hands her the test. "Find out first, freak out later."

And so begins the longest wait of Addison's entire life. "What am I going to do, Emerson?" she asks. "I… what about Alex? What if…"

"Addison, what about _you_? Are _you _happy about this? Do you want to have this baby?"

Addison blinks. "Do I…"

"First gut reaction. Do you want this?"

"I… Well, what about Leslie? He's a _really _great guy and this would kill him. And I like him. I really do. And what about Alex? I mean, he's… he's _Alex_, he's not ready. And I'm not ready. I mean, I'd love to have a baby. And Alex…" Addison's eyes get misty. "Alex would make a great father. He really would. I…"

"What?" Emerson asks, raising an eyebrow. "And that's not about you."

Addison stares intently at the ceiling. "I could never picture myself having a family with Leslie. But, Alex… Oh, this sounds ridiculously cheesy!"

"Will you spit out whatever it is you have to say?" Emerson nearly screams in frustration.

"That was very Callie," Addison says. "I'm impressed."

"Addison, you're avoiding."

"I can see the kids, okay? I actually have a freaking picture in my head! How stupid is that?"

"Wow."

"He's my best friend," Addison admits. "If I were going to have a kid with anybody, shouldn't it be with my best friend?"

"Is that a yes, you want this baby?"

Addison covers her mouth as she realizes the ramifications of what she just said. "Yes," she confesses. "I guess I do."

The timer goes off. "I can't do it," Addison says. She looks at Emerson. "I can't look. I just can't."

Emerson takes the hint and checks. Addison bites her lip nervously. "I mean, it wouldn't be such a bad thing if I weren't. In fact it would be better. We're not ready for this. But… but I want it," Addison babbles.

Emerson stays quiet.

"Emerson, say something," she begs.

The marshal looks up. "Addison, I'm sorry," she says, sadness reading all over the shake of her head she gives and the hand she raises so Addison can see the clear negative.

"Oh."

"Addison-"

Addison cuts off any well-meaning speech with sudden babbling and frantic, jerky movements. "I don't even know how Alex would feel about it or if he'd even want it. It's probably better that I'm not right? I mean, a baby just… it would have screwed things up and there's the trial coming up and…"

"Addison, slow down." She pulls the pacing woman down to sit on the couch. Addison bites her lip and clenches her jaw and force the lump in her throat back down, but it's no use. Tears start slipping down her face.

"I really wanted this," she whispers. She rubs her eyes tiredly. "I have to break up with Leslie."

"Yeah," Emerson agrees quietly.

"You should go. You have other things to be doing."

"You going to be okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm fine," Addison assures her with a small smile.

"Call me after you tell Alex, okay?"

"I'm not telling Alex!" Addison exclaims. "No. That's… that's not an option."

"Why not?"

"Because… because it's just not. Please don't push that."

Emerson hides an eye roll. "Alright, well, just… be nice to Leslie, okay? He deserves to be let down gently. He's done nothing to deserve a nasty break up."

"I promise… Not to be rude, but can you go now? I just… I want to be alone. I need to think."

"You're sure you're okay?"

"I'm _fine_," Addison snaps.

"I'll call you with details about the trial tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay. _Goodbye_, Emerson." Addison can feel herself getting more and more annoyed with the marshal, so it's lucky the woman backs out of the apartment and leaves.

0ooo0

Addison is in a pissy mood for the rest of the day. Nothing is going right. She refuses to talk to Alex because she's afraid of what she'll say and she doesn't want to talk to Leslie because that would just put the cherry on the worst day ever.

Alex offers to make her dinner and she refuses, claiming she just wants to make some macaroni and cheese and call it a night. But as she boils the water she gets distracted and the pot starts boiling over. And for some reason, that just sets her off. When Alex comes into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, he finds Addison sitting at the kitchen table crying.

"Addison, are you okay?" he asks, pulling up a chair next to her.

"I'm fine," she sobs.

"Wow," he chuckles. "That was the worst lie I've ever heard."

"Just shut up, Alex!" she snaps. "Shut up!"

He frowns. "Okay, what did I do?"

"Not everything is about you," she spits, getting up from the table. "Maybe I have something that just doesn't involve you. But of course you'd never think about that. No, of course not. Because everything in my life has to do with you!"

"What the hell, Addison?"

"Nothing, just… nothing!"

"Addison-"

"Just leave me alone!" she yells and storms to her room, slamming the door on the way.

Alex stares after her, wondering what the hell that could have possibly been about.

* * *

**Just know that I really wanted to end it at "Emerson, say something." But I didn't. Because I'm nice sometimes. Although, the title of the last chapter was my hint to you about how this was going to turn out. Anyways, I'd love to hear thoughts!**

**-Juli-**


	13. One Match

**Okay, I KNOW this is short and I KNOW it's been awhile, but please, please accept this as a token of my sincere repentance! This whole college thing is harder than it looks! But my last final is next Wednesday and then I have time! Lots and lots of glorious time! So please let this just tide you over until then?**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

"Addison, what the _hell _was that?" Alex asks. In spite of months of living together or possibly because of them, he'll still chase after her into empty rooms to interrogate her. Besides, that outburst came out of absolutely nowhere.

"Nothing," she replies, turning away from him. She just wants him to go away so she doesn't have to deal with all of the emotions suddenly bubbling to the surface. "I can't just be in a bad mood? What, is that not allowed or something? Sorry. I wasn't aware. I'll just put on a smile and pretend to be fine!"

"So you're _not _fine!" he exclaims.

"Nothing is wrong!" she insists.

"You're the worst liar I've ever met, Addison," he says, rolling his eyes.

"I'm _fine_, Alex."

"Would you stop saying that?"

Addison sighs. "I'm really okay, Alex. I just… it's been a weird day."

He doesn't answer and they sit in silence for a minute. "A weird day?" he finally repeats skeptically.

"Yeah, I… I decided that I'm going to break up with Leslie," she announces.

She might be crazy, but she thinks she sees just a flash of pure joy hidden deep behind the surprise. "You are?"

"I had a wake-up call today," she explains vaguely. "I… he's not right for me, you know?" She fails to mention the part where she knows this is true because she knows exactly who _is _right for her.

"Are you sure?"

She looks up at him. "Yeah. But I'll do it later. Today has been ridiculously exhausting."

"You want to talk about it?"

"No."

"You want to watch crappy movies, eat junk food, and get drunk?" he offers.

Her mouth drops open. "I _love_ you, Alex Karev," she breathes.

They both freeze for a moment as they take in her words then shake them off. "I'll get the popcorn," he says.

"I've got the movies."

0ooo0

Addison paces back and forth outside of Leslie's office. Back and forth and back and forth. Couldn't she just blow her cover and disappear again? That suddenly seems infinitely preferable to breaking up with her boyfriend.

"Addison, what you doing here?" Leslie asks, coming up behind her.

"Jesus, Leslie!" she exclaims, hand raised to her heart as she jumps. "You scared me!"

"Sorry," he apologizes. "Were you looking for me?"

"Can we talk?"

"Of course," he says, opening and holding the door of his office for her.

Suddenly she feels like a student sent to the principal's office, a feeling that is only reinforced when she sits in the chair across from his desk. "I have tell you something first," Addison confides, "before I tell you what I have to say. I just want you to understand, okay? I'm not saying this to hurt you in anyway."

"What's going on, Addison? It sounds like you're trying to break up with me," he laughs.

Addison bites her lip and stares at the carpet.

"Oh."

"Alex and I _did _sleep together," she announces. "After you and I broke up. We slept together and..."

"And?" he prompts.

"I thought I was pregnant," she admits in a hasty jumble. "I'm not. But I thought I was and I realized… I realized I want it. I want to get married and have kids and grow old-"

"You're breaking up with me because you want commitment?" he frowns as he interrupts her.

"No, I just… Leslie, you're one of the most amazing people I've ever met in my entire life. If I had any control over this, I would want for you to propose more than anything. But-"

"You want it all with Alex," he fills in.

"I am _so _sorry," Addison apologizes.

He laughs. "You know, when you said you lived with a guy named Alex, I knew he was going to be trouble. I just thought it would be more along the lines of making us go back to my place."

"I am so sorry I wasted your time."

"Time with you, Addison, was never wasted."

"Why do you have to be so _nice_?"

"My mama raised me right." He offers up a weak smile. "Look, can you see yourself out?"

"I'm sorry, Leslie," she whispers as she heads for the door.

"Make sure he treats you right!" he calls after her.

0ooo0

Even though Addison is now a free agent, she avoids Alex as much as possible. Part of her just wants the time to herself, but most of her is just plain terrified that he might not feel the same way. When he asks, she just plays it off as pre-trial jitters.

Her stilettos tap a nervous beat on the tiles as she paces back and forth. She tugs at her blazer, trying to find something for her hands to do.

"Hey, calm down," he says from his seat.

"I can't!" she snaps. "This is _important_." For the first time since she became actively nervous, she looks over at him. The perfectly fitted suit does absolutely _nothing _to calm the butterflies in her stomach.

'Adds, just tell the truth. God knows we practiced enough."

"I _hate _public speaking," she groans.

"Think of something to distract you," he suggests. "Like shoes or something.

"You really think _shoes _are going to distract me? You think I'm that shallow? Wow, thanks, Alex."

Addison, that's not what I meant and you know it."

"Really? Because that's sure what I seemed to hear."

"Stop trying to pick a fight with me," he chides calmly. "It's not going to work."

"I'm not trying to pick a fight!" she insists. "I'm just upset that my so-called best friend seems to think I'm so ridiculously dumb and shallow that I'll be distracted by _shoes_."

"What's wrong with you?" he snaps, finally starting to rise to her bait.

"Nothing!"

"There's something wrong with you!" he maintains "You've been cranky, irritable, and an all around crap friend lately!"

"I thought I was having your baby! That's why I've been such a "crap friend" lately! What's _your _excuse?"

The air is absolutely still as they both process what she just said.

"Hey, guys," Emerson says, poking her head through the door. "I hope you're ready to testify, because it's time!"

* * *

**Thoughts? And Happy Official Holiday Season! It's my favorite time of year! (It's the most wonderful time of the year, if you will... See what I did there? Bad joke. I apologize.)**

**-Juli-**


	14. Walkaways

**Hey! Long time no see! Sorry, it's been so long. Life gets busy around Christmas, what with finals and friends and family, you know? Anyways, I hope you enjoy!**

**This is dedicated to the always wonderful Miz Katelyn (Kate811). It's not a oneshot, but it's a start, right? (Also, go read her stories. It's what I do when I'm feeling the extreme lack of Addex stories, and she really IS the best.)**

* * *

It's funny really. Addison had spent so many months building up the men who had turned her life completely upside down that walking into the court room and finally looking at those men is almost a letdown. They're not ugly or haggard or monstrous. They're actually kind of… ordinary. No shiver runs down her spine as they look at her, there's no urge to shrink and hide.

She's suddenly glad that she has to testify, because it's giving her something to think about besides the fact that she just blurted out the one thing she never wanted Alex to know. But as she's up on the stand, explaining the night of the shooting, her eye catches Alex's. And then her mind starts to wander as she tries to figure out what the hell might be going on in his head.

How could she have been stupid enough to just blurt that out? Where did it even come from?

"Dr. Montgomery?" the defense lawyer asks.

"Excuse me?" she jumps.

"I asked if you actually saw the people in the car."

"No," she replies. "I didn't."

"So is it possible that someone besides my clients could have been in the car?"

"I suppose so, yes."

"And you took the license plate down? That was very quick thinking. In the heat of the moment, could you have gotten it wrong?"

"No. I got it right."

"How do you know?"

"I've always had a good memory for numbers. I know I got it right."

"No further questions."

0ooo0

"Are you going to say anything?" Addison asks as they sit in a sulky silence. She had thought the hotel room in Seattle was small the first time she saw it. Now it's just plain claustrophobic.

He gives her a look that she thought was reserved for bitchy teenagers to send to their parents. She rolls her eyes. "Okay, sulking isn't going to help."

He turns on the television. "Look," she says. "You're going to have to talk to me at some point. We live together, for God's sake. Just… at least look at me."

His eyes stay trained on the screen. "Fine. Whatever," she snarls, grabbing her purse. She slams the door on her way out.

She jabs the call button for the elevator repeatedly, wanting more than anything to just get out of this damn hotel, to get back to her old life. She wants to go back to a world where Alex Karev is just a snotty intern, where she isn't heartbroken that she's not pregnant, where she doesn't even _want _to be pregnant. She wants her life to right itself and she can't see how to begin to facilitate that.

"Um, Addison?" She looks away from her violent attack on the call button to see Graham looking at her warily. Honestly, she had almost forgotten he existed.

"Graham," she says, pasting a smile on her face.

"What are you doing?"

"Just… need some fresh air. That room is really small, you know?"

"You're, um, not really supposed to leave the hotel. What you did today… well, as brave as it was, it upset a lot of dangerous people."

The elevator dings as the doors slide open. Addison gets on, hoping Graham won't follow her. He doesn't hesitate to step on with her. "Graham, look, I'm just going down to the lobby," she lies.

"Which is why you have your purse?"

"I, uh... I wanted to grab something to eat."

The doors slide open to reveal the lobby. He nods. "Okay."

She's surprised that he bought that off the cuff excuse, but then again, she gets the feeling he doesn't actually believe it. He watches her and she ducks into the restaurant. After quickly checking behind her to make sure he's not watching her anymore, she pushes out the front door and onto the street, just another face in the crowd.

0ooo0

She bounces on the tip of her toes as she waits for her knock to be answered. It's been _months _since she's been in this hotel, in this room and she doesn't even know if anyone is still living here.

The door swings open and rebuffs Addison's fears. "Can I-" is all the black haired woman can get out before Addison throws her arms around her neck and hugs her tight.

"Oh my God, Callie, I have _missed _you," she murmurs.

Callie pulls herself out of Addison's grasp and stares at her with a stony expression. "You're supposed to be gone," she says coldly and closes the door in Addison's face.

Addison frowns and pounds on the door. "Callie, what the hell?"

"Go away!"

"No!"

"I'm not opening the door."

"Fine, I'll talk through it," Addison insists.

"And I won't listen," Callie retorts. Addison can picture the look of pure petulance on her friends face.

"Callie, please, just listen to me."

"No. Look, as far as I'm concerned, you're dead to me. You disappeared without saying anything, I haven't heard from you in almost a year, and you're dead to me."

Addison's heart breaks a little when Callie says that. "Callie, believe me, if I could have contacted you, I would have. But I _couldn't_. I'm breaking about eight thousand rules by being here, Callie. Please just let me come in and _explain _why I went missing! Please?"

The silence feels like it stretches for an eternity. But slowly the doorknob tilts and the door opens. "Rules?" Callie asks.

0ooo0

"The Witness Protection Program?" Callie exclaims. "Oh, come on, Addison, you can do better than that."

"No, Cal, I'm serious. I can't tell you the details or anything, but it's true. I'm not nearly creative enough to have come up with it on my own."

Callie grits her teeth and stares at the carpet. "I thought you were _dead_, Addison. Every day I thought that they were going to find your body in some dumpster or something. Do you know exactly how many people they told about you being gone? None. No one knew where you were or why you disappeared and we all thought the worst!"

"I am _so _sorry, Callie! I have wanted to call you, to let you know I'm okay, since I left. But it's against every rule in the book. I'm not supposed to be here right now. I basically ran away."

"Why?"

"Because Alex was being ridiculously bitchy and I needed to get out."

"Alex? Wait, as in Alex Karev Alex?"

"Yes, as in Alex Karev Alex. What other Alex do we know?"

"I don't know, you've got some whole new secret life now and Alex isn't exactly an unusual name!" Callie snaps.

Addison sighs, "Sorry. I just… forgot that for a moment."

"So why's he being bitchy?" Callie asks, accepting her peace offering.

"I didn't tell him I thought I was pregnant with his baby for like a minute, even though it turned out it was just a false alarm and I got my period two days later."

"_WHAT?_" Callie screams.

Addison looks up, her gaze level. "Oh," she says calmly. "Did I forget to mention the part where Alex and I slept together and I'm probably in love with him?"

* * *

**I'll try to get the next chapter up here before Christmas, hopefully. That is my goal. In the meantime, if you happen to have a Twitter account and you, for some reason, would like up to the minute updates on what I'm up to with all my stories and a way to give suggestions or thought in a way I check FAR more often than my email (and possibly win stuff, if you would like... well, shoutouts and characters and oneshots... stuff like that) go check out _Darling_Pretty_ on Twitter. It's me, promise!**

**-Juli-**


	15. On The Floor

**Hi! Sorry it's been so long and sorry this is so short! But I had to stop where I did because... well, you'll see. I'm really sorry I didn't post more in the past couple weeks, but three weeks of breaks just isn't enough time and now I'm back in class! Fortunately, two of my classes are snore inducing and the best way I've found for avoiding snoring is to write in class! So that's cool.**

**I own nothing.

* * *

**

Back at the hotel, Alex notices that a rather substantial amount of time has passed since Addison had stormed out. (Just because he had been giving her the cold shoulder didn't mean he wasn't paying attention to her—he's always paying attention to her whether he likes it or not; it's not a voluntary thing.) Of course he's still angry at her—how could she _not _mention the fact that she had thought she was pregnant?—but she's been gone a _really_ long time and it's not as if they're going about their normal lives. They're back in Seattle, where a bunch of ruthless men want to kill them. And if anything happens to her because she stormed out on him… well, he doesn't want to think about it, but he knows it's not something he could come back from.

He walks out of the hotel room and knocks on the door of Emerson's hotel room. She answers the door, her hair still damp from the shower. "Alex. Hi." She doesn't try to hide the surprise in her voice. Alex has never actively tried to seek her out. "Can I help you with something?"

"I can't find Addison."

"What?"

"Look, I know it's stupid, but she stormed out and she hasn't come back and she's probably fine, but…"

"I get it. Hold on." She pulls out her cell phone and dials. "Graham, where are you? Have you seen Addison? When?" Emerson curses under her breath. "And you haven't since then? You're sure? Ugh. Graham- _not helpful_!"

She hangs up and then turns to Alex. "Graham saw her heading into the restaurant almost two hours ago. He's going to check now, but you and I both know she's not there. Alex, I need you to think. Where would she go? If she needed help or anything, where would she go?"

Alex pretends that his heart doesn't skip a few beats, that he doesn't start to freak out now that his fears are confirmed. Where the hell is she? He fights the vague, hazy feeling of fear. "Uh, yeah, um… She'd…" Alex suddenly realizes just how little he knew about Addison before they started living together and… of course now that she's missing and might be in danger, now he wants to know everything. "Callie!" he exclaims as the realization hits. "She'd go see Callie."

"Callie?" Emerson repeats slowly, trying to place the name and face.

"Her, um, her best friend."

"Where?"

"I think she lives at the same hotel Addison used ot. Maybe."

"Where?"

"I'm coming with you."

"I don't think so, Alex," Emerson retorts.

"You can either take me or I can follow you. Your choice."

Emerson rolls her eyes. "Fine, come on. But only because we don't have time for this. What did you say the hotel's name was?"

0oooo0

_Addison looks up, her gaze level. "Oh," she says calmly. "Did I forget to mention the part where Alex and I slept together and I'm probably in love with him?"_

She is saved from explaining by a knock at the door. Callie gets up to answer it. "Callie Torres?" Addison winces when she hears Emerson's voice.

"Um, yes?"

"Addison?" Emerson calls. "Are you here?"

Addison walks slowly to the door, looking just a hint sheepish.

"What the _hell _were you thinking?" Emerson starts ranting. "In what world is you disappearing the day you testify okay?"

Addison stares at the floor and Callie looks shocked. Where the hell did her kickass best friend go? She decides to take matters into her own hands. "Hey, she needed a break! Back off!"

Emerson rolls her eyes. "Do you know just how many rules she's broken?"

Callie glares at the marshal. And then she promptly slams the door in her face.

"Callie!" Addison exclaims.

"What?"

"That was a federal agent!"

"Who was being a bitch. The woman deserved to have a door slammed in her face!"

Addison purses her lips. And then agrees. "Yeah, okay. She kind of did."

"There's the Addison I remembered. I was getting worried. You were acting kind of zombie-ish there for a second. Now come on, I want to hear about Alex."

They ignore Emerson's knocking and Addison tells the whole story again, this time including Leslie, the break up, the sex, and everything. Just as Callie starts to demand more detail on the whole sex part of the equation, there's another knock on the door.

"Addison?" Graham's voice is far more sedate than Emerson's ever was.

Callie looks to Addison for direction. Addison shrugs so they stay quiet.

"Addison?" Alex's voice suddenly comes through the door. Callie doesn't even wait for confirmation before opening the door. He pushes past her and crosses to Addison. Graham stands awkwardly in the door.

"Addison, what the hell?" Alex asks as he reaches her, his eyes roaming her body to make sure she's in one piece. Addison plays with her sleeve and doesn't meet his eyes. He stops his rant to ask "Are you okay?"

"So you're talking to me now?"

He frowns. "You can't drop something like that on me and expect me to be totally fine!"

They stare at each other, having a conversation that no one can hear. "I know," Addison finally sighs. "I'm sorry."

"You're okay?"

"Yeah, I am," she nods.

"We need to go," Graham says.

It takes five minutes to convince Addison and Callie to part and then another five for them to say goodbye—with promises of future visits now that Callie knows the full story.

Both Emerson and Graham start to relax as it seems like they've gotten away with this whole little excursion with no repercussions when Addison and Alex are struck with a crazy sense of déjà vu. Shots ring out, tires, squeal, and an engine revs as car drives away.

Alex, again, grabs Addison and gets her to the ground. He grins at her as he recognizes the familiarity of the situation and starts to roll off of her. He pulls his hand out from underneath her shoulder (he had the forethought to cushion her fall this time) and frowns.

Addison's eyes widen as they both realize that his hand is red and she starts to feel the bullet that has torn its way into her shoulder.

* * *

**Gigi, I'd just like to point out that I never DENIED that Addison was shot... I'm going to go hide in a cave somewhere now. I'm a little worried for my life. Don't hurt me!**

**-Juli-**


	16. Awake My Soul

**Sorry for the delay and that this is so short! Life has gotten so freaking busy. It's unfortunate. Well, enjoy!**

**I own nothing.

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**

She grits her teeth as the pain in her shoulder intensifies. She comes to decision that no matter how bad it gets, she's not going to scream. But that resolution is getting harder to stick to and she whimpers.

In the background Graham and Emerson call in the shooting and for an ambulance, but neither Addison nor Alex really hear them. The doctor in Alex's brain kicks in and he starts to take care of Addison.

"Addison, stay with me," he says as he looks around for things to stop her bleeding.

She laughs shakily. "That's the plan."

As hard as she tries to focus on Alex, she can feel herself slipping into shock and right into unconsciousness as she loses blood. "Hey, Alex?" she asks woozily.

"Yeah?" he replies.

"Don't date somebody named Ronnette. That is a horrible name. Don't do it."

He laughs, but it's strangled in his throat. "Okay, I won't. Promise."

"And I'm sorry," she continues.

"It's fine," he says, brushing off her apology.

"No, really. I'm sorry… I should have said something."

"Addison, it's fine. I shouldn't have gotten so upset."

"You're just saying that because I've got a hole in my shoulder," she jokes weakly. "Here's the thing," she continues. "Not my best idea, but I think I'm losing too much blood and I'm probably going to pass out in a couple seconds. So I just want to say…"

She trails off, blinking to try to ward off the dizziness. She knows what she wants to say to him just in case things turn out badly, but she can't seem to actually make her mouth form those three words.

The wooziness overcomes her and she can't really say what's going on, but she _swears _that she feels his lips press against hers right before she passes out as promised.

0ooo0

She opens her eyes slowly. The first thing she notices is that one of her hands seems to be particularly heavy. A glance confirms that this is because that hand has another resting on it. Her eyes follow the hand to an arm, shoulder, neck, and finally to the face of Alex Karev. "You're staring," she says groggily. "That's creepy. Try not being so stalkery next time I wake up from surgery."

"Don't even joke about that," he snaps.

She frowns as she takes in their surroundings. "This is Seattle Grace."

"Yeah, well, where'd you think we'd end up? We were five minutes away."

"Oh yeah, that was definitely what I was thinking about while being shot."

He looks away from her, obviously upset.

"Sorry," she apologizes. "How did the surgery go?"

"Perfectly," he answers. "Which si good since you had about half the hospital in the gallery."

"What?"

"Well, they did think you died and then you _did _almost die."

"So I guess the cat's out of the bag."

"Yeah, pretty much. Graham's posted outside your door, you know. You've got police protection.""

"Yeah, well, what else is new?" she jokes. Then she becomes serious. "Alex, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the baby… or lack thereof. I was going to, but I wasn't and I didn't… um…"

"Um what?"

She picks at a loose thread in the sheet with her good hand. "I… didn't want you to know how… how disappointed I was." She refuses to meet his eyes.

"Disappointed?"

"I thought I was pregnant for maybe an hour, but… that life… I wanted it. I- I still do."

"Addison-"

"You're my best friend, Alex," she talks over him. "And even though I was with Leslie, all I ccould think about was _you_ and what our kid might look like and… and when that was taken from me… I… it crushed me."

"Addison-" he tries again.

"I should have told you. I know that. But I didn't want… I didn't want to tell you and… and have you be relieved. It would have… I couldn't have handled it."

Finally he gives up on the talking thing altogether and leans down to silence her lips with his. She tenses up for just one second but lets herself surrender quickly. "Addison," he says quietly when they come up for air. "I-"

"You're _alive_?"

Addison rolls her eyes and curses under her breath. Then she turns to the intruder. "Yes, Derek, I am, in fact, alive."

"What the hell?"

"How'd you even get past Graham?" she deflects.

"Handy thing about being a neurosurgeon—people don't tend to question you when you walk really fast and throw big words at them."

"Egomaniac," Addison laughs.

"What happened?" he asks, refusing to take her bait.

"What happened when?"

"Don't be difficult. You're lying in a hospital bed with a gunshot wound which would be upsetting enough even if we weren't all certain you were dead for a year. You owe me an explanation."

"I, uh, I…" Addison stammers. She just doesn't know what to tell him.

"Look," Alex jumps in. "She just got shot. Give her some time."

Derek's eyebrows nearly disappear into his hair. "Since when do you speak for her, Karev?"

"Leave him alone, Derek," Addison demands.

"No, _Addison_, now I'm curious. Since when does your intern suddenly get the right to talk for you?"

"It's been a _year_, Derek! Things have changed."

"And by things you mean…"

"I mean it's none of your business."

"Dude, leave her alone."

"Again with the speaking thing."

"If I say we're together will you just leave me alone?" Addison finally asks exasperatedly.

"You're together?"

"We're together?"

"Derek, give us five minutes. I mean it. Get out."

He walks out of the room in a sort of daze. The room suddenly feels very awkward. "I, um, sorry," Addison apologizes. "I just wanted him to stop talking and it was the only thing I could think of and we're not together obviously. I mean, not if you don't want us to be and… uh… why are you smiling like that?"

"You have no idea how much I've wanted to hear you say that," he explains before kissing her again.

"Ow," she says after a minute.

He pulls away and the amount of worry on his face almost makes her want to cry. "Are you okay?"

"Just starting to feel this thing." She gestures at her shoulder. Then she grins. "But please, don't stop on my account." And then she reaches up to grab his collar and pull his lips to hers again.

And the fireworks she sees leaves her wondering just what the hell took the two of them so freaking long.

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**We're kind of coming to the end of this story, which is kind of sad. But it only means that I have more time to write OTHER stories. Well, hope you enjoyed!**

**-Juli-**


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